The Five Types Of Love We’ll All Fall Into In Our Lives

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1. Our first love.

Our first love is that young love we find as a teenager. This is the one we think we’ll be with forever. There’s this naive hope to this person.

I disagree with people who say kids don’t know what love is. I think when you are young you know a love that is pure and genuine and hopeful. You hang onto this and you put everything you possibly can into this person and this relationship.

This love is the one that hurts the most. This love is the one that teaches you about pain and how strong you actually can be.

For the rest of your life, you always love this person. Even when you cross paths with them years later and you realize how the people you’ve turned into would never be compatible now, you look at them and so much of who you are is because of them.

For the rest of your life, you think back to all the good times you had and you forever hold a piece of each other’s heart.

2. The one that got away.

This person is the ‘what if’ person. The one you think of when you get drunk and you’re alone with your thoughts. The one you truly believed would be standing there holding your hand in a church as you got married.

You looked at this person and saw a future. Someone you’d be proud to standby. The person that made sense.

But for one reason or the other, it didn’t work out between you. When it came down to it, maybe your history was too much to have a future. Maybe the pain you caused each other, running in circles made you realize all you had going for one another was the past you clung to.

Maybe when push came to shove they didn’t choose you when they needed to. This is the person you would have risked it all for.

3. The one you didn’t see coming.

This is the love that just happens out of nowhere. Someone who comes into your life at a point when you need someone to love you. They aren’t your soulmates. But they make you happy for right now.

You spend time together that’s enjoyable and you say I love you because you do. Maybe you aren’t in love with them and wooing over everything they say. But this is the love that comes into your life after heartbreak. Someone who loves you the best they can show you, you deserve someone who appreciates you.

It doesn’t work out because the first problem that occurs instead of trying to work through it, you realize you don’t care enough to.

4. The one who changes your standards.

This is the person you think is almost too perfect. The love you put on a pedestal. The one who comes into your life appearing to be everything you could have ever wanted in a person.

You look at them and you love them even before you really get to know them. Then as you learn more about who they are you find yourself falling harder. You look at things in the world and you suddenly see them in all of it.

This person is the one you love a little more than they love you. This is the person you wake up thinking about. The one who consumes your thoughts at night. You realize it’s a level of infatuation. You jump ahead in your mind of everything you could be together.

They are the ones your family loves, the person who seems truly make you happy. They treat you the way you deserve.

They are honest and hardworking. They learn you and build your trust. This is the person who you tell things to you’ve never said out loud. They are your best friend. The best person you know. The one who forgives you for your shortcomings. The love you want more than anything to be the right one.

The problem in putting someone on a pedestal is you devalue yourself and you’re the one who doesn’t feel good enough for them. And when it ends, it’s never bad. You walk away grateful. You walk away wondering can someone be better than them?

You have these new set of standards and expectations that change your dating game.

This person is the one that teaches you a good person doesn’t mean the right person.

5. The one who chooses you and stays.

This person looks a lot like every past love you’ve had. Because the truth is there is a piece of each of them in you and you take their good qualities and apply that to what you expect of everyone after them.

This person is the one you can love as deep as your first love. The only difference is the fantasy of your future together becomes a reality, as they add confidence to everything you fee.

This person heals you from the ‘what if person’. Because you aren’t haunted by the past when you realize this is why everything played out as it did.

This is the person who works with you through the problems and doesn’t walk away from that first fight. Their love feels like the right love.

This person you also didn’t see coming. But they looked at you and knew right off the bat. You didn’t think much of it but they did.

This person teaches you there is no perfect person but there is someone who compliments you in such a way you realize you might be perfect for each other.

They hold true to your standards and expectations but they also make what you thought was your best love look bad.

This is the person who looks at you and they think they are the lucky one and they spend every day proving that to you.

This is the person who makes you realize you’re both their number one choice and the only choice that makes sense.

You realize compared to everyone in each of your pasts this person blows everyone else away.

Not only do you think of a future with them, you start building it and working towards it. You wake up and they are the first thing you see. And for the first time, you realize what it’s like to see the next fifty years in someone else’s eyes. TC mark

Kirsten Corley

Kirsten is the author of But Before You Leave, a book of poetry about the experiences we struggle to put into words.

Stop searching for happiness in the same place you lost it. Change is not dismantling the old, it’s building the new.

“The main thing socially intelligent people understand is that your relationship to everyone else is an extension of your relationship to yourself.” — Brianna Wiest

“The things you love about others are the things you love about yourself. The things you hate about others are the things you cannot see in yourself.” — Brianna Wiest

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