14 Signs He’s Just Not That Into You, Even If You Don’t Want To Believe It

God & Man

“But what I can do is paint you a picture of what you’ll never see when you’re with a guy who’s really into you: You’ll never see yourself staring maniacally at your phone, willing it to ring. You’ll never see you ruining an evening with friends because you’re calling for your messages every fifteen seconds. You’ll never see you hating yourself for calling him when you know you shouldn’t have. What you will see is you being treated so well that no phone antics will be necessary. You’ll be too busy being adored.” – Greg Behrendt

I think when it comes to dating and relationships, we glorify the good moments and hold onto that while dismissing the bad stuff. When in reality if someone likes you the good moments will outweigh the bad ones with a landslide.

Sometimes we hang on so tight to someone, we don’t realize it’s only us making the effort.

1. It’s always you initiating contact.

A guy who likes you will want to talk to you a lot. If he’s not texting you or calling you it’s because he’s not thinking about you.

2. He doesn’t always answer.

While you are quick to answer anything he sends, he doesn’t reciprocate it. A guy who likes you will be happy to hear from you.

3. And when he does, it’s short responses.

It’s you always keeping the conversation going. It’s not enough to answer, the conversation shouldn’t feel like work.

4. He cancels on you often.

Plans you might have been looking forward to all week, he bails on hours before. A guy who likes you won’t cancel and if he does he’ll immediately make it up to you because doesn’t want you to leave.

5. It’s always you going the extra mile.

Sure it’s nice of you and all but eventually, he’s going to realize she’ll do anything I ask her too. He might go from respecting you to expecting things from you because he knows you’ll do it.

6. He confuses the shit out of you.

If you have to send the “WTF” text to your friends with a screenshot, he doesn’t like you.

One day it’s one thing, the next day it’s something new. While there are moments it seems like he likes you, he completely pulls away if it appears he cared too much. If a guy likes you he won’t confuse. He will be honest and clear and forward that he wants you and only you.

Don’t invest time and energy into someone who plays you.

7. You hear from him only when he’s drunk.

He’s the king of drunk texting or calling at 2 AM. Don’t be happy he thinks about you when he’s obliterated. Choose someone who wants you sober.

8. He hasn’t taken you out yet.

Maybe you hang out low-key. Maybe you hook up and that’s it. Maybe you meet up at bars. But if a guy hasn’t taken you out on a real date, it’s because he doesn’t want to actually date you.

9. He keeps you waiting.

You are always waiting for him. Whether it’s a text or a plan confirmed. Maybe he drops the line he isn’t ready for a relationship yet. Don’t wait for someone to figure out they want you, choose someone who knows right away.

10. He’s always busy or making excuses.

Busy also means he’s not interested. As someone who is the busiest person in the entire world, even with a schedule booked for the next three months, if I like someone I will find time to fit them into my life and I won’t makes excuses why I can’t.

11. He gives the bare minimum of effort to keep you around.

He gives just enough to keep you coming back and adoring him. But you deserve someone’s best always. Don’t think too much into that like or text or snap. Those things aren’t enough and you shouldn’t read so much into it.

12. He’s making you a choice while you’re his priority.

You’ll always put him first and when it comes to you he considers what his other options are. After that, stop allowing yourself to even be someone, he can pick.

13. He’s good at apologizing.

The right guy who likes you and cares about you won’t have to apologize or backtrack any of his steps. The right guy won’t mess up in the first place. Don’t be flattered that he owned up to what he did wrong, judge him and walk away for making such a mistakes.

14. Your friends don’t like him.

I live by the rule if my friends do not like someone it’s because they aren’t good for me. Your friends love you and adore so if they don’t like someone it’s because you are settling for less than you deserve.

At the end of the day we all want someone who wants us and sometimes it takes letting go to finally get what we deserve. TC mark

Kirsten Corley

Kirsten is the author of But Before You Leave, a book of poetry about the experiences we struggle to put into words.

Trace the scars life has left you. It will remind you that at one point, you fought for something. You believed.

“You are the only person who gets to decide if you are happy or not—do not put your happiness into the hands of other people. Do not make it contingent on their acceptance of you or their feelings for you. At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter if someone dislikes you or if someone doesn’t want to be with you. All that matters is that you are happy with the person you are becoming. All that matters is that you like yourself, that you are proud of what you are putting out into the world. You are in charge of your joy, of your worth. You get to be your own validation. Please don’t ever forget that.” — Bianca Sparacino

Excerpted from The Strength In Our Scars by Bianca Sparacino.

Read Here

More From Thought Catalog