To The People Who Text Me Back Quickly, Thank you

Thought.is

It doesn’t matter who it is. It doesn’t matter the time of day.

There is something about texting and delays, I just can’t deal with sometimes.

It’s like my number 1 pet peeve.

Maybe it’s anxiety. Maybe I’m nuts.

I don’t know what it is? I don’t know why I can’t control it?

But every time there is a delay in conversation my first thought is I’ve said something wrong or done something.

I immediately jump to ten million conclusions of why the other person on that end isn’t answering. Most come down to me.

I create problems in my own head. I drive myself crazy. I look too frequently at my phone and jump at any movement.

The logical part of my brain says, ‘not everyone has their phones on them all the time like you.’ Or ‘maybe they are working and busy.’ ‘Maybe they are taking a shower or on the phone.’

The irrational part of my brain tells me the person is mad or annoyed or trying to irritate you by not answering. The irrational part of my brain says they don’t want to talk to you, they want nothing to do with you. It says everyone has their phone on them these days.

Next thing I know I’m checking every one of their social media platforms to see activity in the event they are ignoring me.

Honestly, there’s too much. Snapchat. Instagram. Facebook. Twitter. (Do people even communicate through twitter anymore?) SnapStories. InstaStories. Facebook Messager. InstaMessager. SnapMessages. SnapTexts not meaning as much as a real text. Completely forgetting the conversation because it disappears.

As someone who still writes hand written letters, I get completely lost in all of this.

The following and adding etiquette is just too much for me.

There’s something that really grinds my gears about a person who ignores your text but then likes your insta. There’s something really annoying about someone who will look at your snap story but not answer your snap text.

The person who you know has their phone on them always but isn’t answering. The game of social media and the impact it has on people like me makes me feel crazy.

Whether the person’s intentions are melodious or not my paranoid ass comes up with every worst case scenario.

And every time I’m contemplating sending a double text, knowing very well I shouldn’t.

And if it’s someone like my best friend who isn’t impacted by multiple lengthy texts, they will come back to their phone with a novel written, that’ll take them approximately 7 minutes to read. Or a tag, share, and a snap.

I analyze the length of texts and overanalyze every chosen word. I reread shit I’ve said more than once. I think way too much. But the root of it is caring.

I care a lot about what people think. I care a lot about saying the wrong things. Or saying too much.

Every text will be followed by I’m sorry.

And maybe I answer texts too quickly. Maybe I don’t play that texting game you’re supposed to when talking to someone. Maybe I do everything wrong. But if the worst thing someone could say about me are my texting and social media habits and the fact I care maybe I’m not as bad as I think I am.

But to all those people who answer back quickly, who provide explanations for delays, deal with the long texts and tags completely accepting it and care to hold a conversation where it isn’t just me asking questions, you are the real MVP. TC mark

Kirsten Corley

Kirsten is the author of But Before You Leave, a book of poetry about the experiences we struggle to put into words.

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