The honest truth is I’ll pull away when I think I’m being too much to handle.
I’ll want to apologize for something I might have done wrong.
But at the same time, I don’t want to bother you.
I’m caught somewhere between giving up and trying to make it right.
The truth is I don’t want to be the first one to text you every time.
I don’t want to make the effort all the time and plan things.
I want to feel wanted.
I want to feel like you want me in your life and it isn’t just me trying for this thing.
But more than that I want you to notice that I’m pulling away.
I want you to want me to stay.
Because the honest truth is I don’t want to leave but I kind of feel I have to.
The truth is I want to take off but look back and see you behind me.
I want you to ask me to stay.
Because the honest truth about leaving is all any girl wants is someone who doesn’t want them to and does something to prove it.
Someone who will chase after us when we go.
Someone who will grab us by the wrist pulls us in and say I want you to stay. I need you to stay.
We pull away because we feel unwanted. Unappreciated. We feel like a burden when we have to try too hard. So we stop.
We look for reasons to leave because the only thing scarier than leaving is finding someone who makes us want to stay.
The only thing scarier than leaving is finding someone who doesn’t want us to.
So we take off running because that’s what we are good at.
We look forward and not back out of fear that one day we’ll find someone who gives us a reason to turn around.
That person who gives us a reason to stop.
That person who doesn’t let us go.
And the honest truth about people who leave is finding that same thing we want but fear. Finding someone who makes us stop running.