You might have noticed you have a type. Whether it’s a physical look or a set of personality traits, you tend to gravitate toward similar people. This has to do with your unique likes and dislikes, of course, but you can trace your compatibility back to an interesting place — the order in which you were born.
Whether you’re the oldest, the baby or an only child will affect the way you seek out a partner in the future. And your spot in the pecking order can help uncover the ways to tell that you really like the person you’re with — aside from that flutter in your heart.
Find where you are in the birth order and see what your ideal partner will be like — and how you can tell they might be the one:
If you’re the oldest, you know all about responsibility. Not only were you in charge of leading by example and teaching your younger siblings the ropes, but you might have also had to care for them in your parents’ absence.
As such, you’re naturally responsible — which is a blessing and a curse. On the one hand, you have it all together, and you’re the one people count on. On the other hand, you might find your routine to be a bit boring — you don’t have much experience being spontaneous or slightly irresponsible, and that’s a shame.
So, if you start dating someone who inspires you to break out of that comfort zone you’ve been curating since your youth, they might be someone really special. Trying new things and going against the grain — yes, you can have a few drinks on a work night — will help you uncover a fun side of your personality, and your true love will be someone who can bring that out in you. In other words, if you’re willing to let go of control and let someone else lead, then you’ve found a keeper.
The middle child might be notorious for acting out, but it’s for a good reason — you tend to do so because you get a little lost in the fray. You’re not the leader of the pack, nor are you youngest child who needs the most guidance — you’re right in between. This position does make you great at peacekeeping and remaining calm under pressure, but it also makes you more comfortable out of the spotlight. Sometimes, you might even feel less than confident in your own abilities, too.
Now, imagine you meet someone who believes in you and pushes you to be the bold, commanding presence you are deep down inside. Upon hearing this positive praise and inspiration, you think to yourself, “Maybe they’re right.” Do you know what that means? It means you really like this person because they’re able to get you to truly overcome your middle child status and go for whatever it is you want.
Everyone from your parents to your siblings to your grandparents, aunts, and uncles doted on you when you were little. Because you were the baby, there was probably a long stretch of time where you could do no wrong — you might’ve even used it to your advantage, getting out of punishments by being the littlest.
This type of praise made you into quite a confident person, but your state of mind is a blessing and a curse. Sometimes, it can be hard for you to accept defeat or ignore your impulses. Now, let’s imagine you’re dating someone who’s very down to earth, calm and strategic. They help you think through your decisions — and you follow their advice. This is exactly the kind of person you need, and if you listen to their words, then it means you really feel strongly about them.
The only child is the wildcard on this list. Rather than having personality traits shaped by sibling dynamics, you’re molded by your parents, your extended family members, and your friends. Still, there’s one thread that ties only children together: You’re all great observers. You listen well, and you soak up everything that a person says to you.
An only child’s road to finding someone who could be “the one” is a little bit tougher because you’re not going to let just anyone in. But the payoff for holding out is sweet — you can tell when someone gets you, that you can let them in and that they’re someone you really like.
The Choice Is Yours
While all these clues are certainly considerations to make as you delve into the world of dating, love is inexplicable sometimes. So, don’t limit yourself to those who fit the people described above — you might just find your person breaks from the norm, and you love them for that, too.