1. I caught you doing cocaine in front of your daughter.
“Because I caught you doing cocaine in front of your daughter.”
2. I could have had better conversations with walls.
“You were literally dumb as shit. I could have had better conversations with walls.”
3. I favorited one of your tweets rather than retweeting it.
“Because you were legitimately mad that I favorited one of your tweets rather than retweeting it.”
4. I did not tag you in a Facebook post.
“We got in a three-hour argument because I did not tag you in a Facebook post.”
5. You got mad at me for not watching you sleep.
“You got mad at me for not watching you sleep. Why would I watch you sleep?”
6. HOW THE F**K HAVEN’T YOU SEEN STAR WARS?
“When I talk about simple movie quotes you looked at me with a blank face. HOW THE F**K HAVEN’T YOU SEEN STAR WARS?”
7. Because you sold my guitar on eBay to buy jeans.
“Because you sold my very first bass guitar I bought when I was 14, (that was signed by Les Claypool and Steve Harris) for $117 on eBay to buy a new pair of jeans while I was out of town.”
8. Because you wanted an engagement ring that cost at least $50K.
“Because you refused to say ‘yes’ unless your engagement ring was at least $50,000.”
9. Because your house looked like an episode of Hoarders.
“You looked normal enough, but when I pulled up to your house, to take you on our first (and last) date, I felt like I was entering the set of Hoarders.”
10. Because you drove home drunk three times in one year after we argued.
“Because you drove home drunk three times in one year after we argued. I don’t want to be called by your kids when their mom does not make it home.”
11. Because all you listened to were Hindi songs.
“Because all you listened to were Hindi songs.”
12. You didn’t believe that I loved you.
“You would never have a real convo with me so I never knew what you wanted or how you felt. You believed no one would ever love you, but I did.”
13. You wouldn’t be open and honest.
“I told you that I didn’t mind what you did if you could be open and honest about it, turns out those were the only two things you wouldn’t do.”
14. You hurted me.
“Because I showed you I love you and you never saw that. You hurted me.”