150+ Best Questions For Couples to Ask Each Other [2020]

By January Nelson Updated July 29, 2020

Yi Liu

By January Nelson Updated July 29, 2020

Yi Liu

In order to have a healthy relationship with a person, you have to be brave enough to ask those uncomfortable, serious questions when the time comes. Having those deeper conversations about your hopes, dreams, and fears can be really hard but also really helpful in developing a successful, romantic relationship. Not only is it a good way to start a great conversation, but also a good way to really understand each other and see if you’re compatible in love or if you have the same outlook on life.

Fun Questions For Couples To Ask Each Other

Are you just starting a new relationship? Here are some random and funny questions you can ask each other to simply get the conversation going.

What is the weirdest thing you are afraid of?
What is something that makes you laugh?
Have you ever lied to get out of a conversation?
Would you rather live somewhere that is warm, hot, cold, or gets a mix of all the seasons?
Would you rather be unable to lie or be unable to speak?
Is there a song that makes you think of me?
Do you like to read? If so, what is your favorite book?
What is your favorite drink (alcoholic or non-alcoholic)?
What qualities do you look for in a partner?
When was your first kiss?
What is your favorite sport to watch?
What is something you love to do in your free time?
What is the worst thing that has happened to you on a date?
Do you snore?
What is your favorite flavor of ice cream?
Do you hold grudges or do you forgive easily?
What kind of music do you like listening to?
Are you an early riser or a night owl?
When you were a kid, what was your dream job?
What is your spirit animal?
What is your favorite color?
What was the most embarrassing moment in your life?
What is your favorite movie?
Do you prefer Halloween or Christmas?
Have you ever been heartbroken?
What is your favorite way to watch a movie: in theaters, in bed, or on the couch?
What is a bad habit you have?
Have you ever dyed or wanted to dye your hair?
Where is your dream vacation destination?
How do you feel about large crowds of people?
If you could trade lives with someone, who would it be?
What is your favorite food?
What is one thing no one knows about you?
Do you use social media?
If you had a bad day, how would you want to spend your night to make it end on a good note?
If you were a superhero, what would your superpower be?
Did you like high school or college better?
What exotic animal are you interested in?
Have you ever gone to therapy?
Which of your friends are the most like you?
If you had one week left on earth, what would you do?
What is a quality you really like about yourself?
If a genie gave you three wishes, what would you ask for?
Do you like coffee? If so, how do you take it?
Are you more of an optimist, a pessimist, or a realist?
Do you like to play video games?
If you could move anywhere in the world and not have to work for a whole year, where would you go?
Do you have a go-to karaoke song?
Do you believe in aliens?
Do you believe in ghosts?
If you could visit any major city, which one would you go to?
What is your favorite meal of the day: breakfast, lunch, or dinner?
Are you superstitious?
You’re at brunch…do you order a mimosa or a bloody mary?
Do you like physical activities, like hiking, skiing, skateboarding, doing yoga?
Who is the first person you call when you’re in trouble?
Are you friends with any of your exes?
What is your ideal Sunday morning?
Which one do you prefer: the beach, the mountains, the desert, or the city?
Are there any conspiracy theories that fascinate you?

Questions For Couples To Get Deeper

Developing emotional intimacy with your partner is truly the most important thing in a relationship. Without intimacy or closeness, both emotionally and physically, the relationship is almost doomed. Before you two say “I do”, there are some deep questions you should ask each other to get a little deeper in love.

What is your ideal first date?
What is your zodiac sign?
What is something you wish someone taught you a long time ago?
Can you tell me a secret?
What is your biggest fear?
What is your favorite thing about me?
What is your love language?
What is your Myers Briggs type?
Do you believe in fate?
What did your last relationship teach you?
What is something you miss about being a kid?
What, to you, is more important: traveling or owning luxurious items?
What are 3 things on your bucket list?
What is your biggest goal in life?
Who is your role model?
Who do you miss the most?
What was your first thought when we met?
Would you rather be crazy rich or deeply in love?
What makes you happy?
Do you believe in soulmates or love at first sight?
If you could plan a perfect date for us, what would we do?
When was the last time you cried?
Have you ever been in love?
Would you rather be rich and miserable or poor and happy?
Do you have any relationship deal-breakers?
What are the five things you are most thankful for right now?
What about yourself are you the proudest of?
Do you ever want to get married?
What is something that calms you down?
Would you say you’re a confident person?
Have you ever done hard drugs? If so, what?
Are you typically a leader or a follower?
What is the hardest life lesson you’ve had to learn?
What do you think your weaknesses are?
What is your biggest regret in life?

Questions For Couples To Ask Before Marriage

No matter if you’re going to be a husband or a wife or you’re a boyfriend or a girlfriend–if you’re in a committed relationship with someone, consider asking these serious questions. You can either keep the answer to yourself or think about actually bringing them up as a conversation starter to see what your spouse or partner has to say. Having a deep conversation with your partner every once in a while is great for building trust and making sure you’re on the same page about the relationship.

If you’re feeling stuck and don’t really know where to start this kind of conversation, here are some insightful questions you can start with:

Do you like pets? If so, what kind of pet would you want?
Have you ever cheated on someone while in a relationship?
Are you religious or spiritual?
What are your political views?
How do you feel about abortion?
Do you want kids? If so, how many?
Would you ever consider adoption?
What should we do if a family member wants to borrow a large sum of money?
What, do you think, is the key to a successful relationship?
What relationship goals do you have for us?
Do you deal with any mental health issues I should be aware of? If so, when something arises, how can I help?
If you could describe our relationship in one word, what would it be?
Does anyone in your family suffer from alcoholism or drug addiction?
What is your family’s medical history like?
What is your biggest fear about marriage?
If we get stuck in our marriage, would you be willing to seek outside help with a therapist?
What excites you about getting married?
What do you think our life will look like in 10 years?
Do you think we’re comfortable enough with each other to discuss our needs in the bedroom?
Do you have any doubts about our relationship?
If, for medical reasons, we can’t have sex, how drastically will our relationship change?
How often would you want to visit your family or my family?
What role does your family play in our life together?
Would you ever relocate for love?
How do you handle your anger?
Is alone time important to you?
Would you say you are a giver or a taker or a matcher?
Is there something about your past that I should know about?
Have you ever been to prison?
When we retire, where do you want to live?
Do you have any love or relationship questions you want to ask me?

Questions For Couples That Lead To Love

To Fall in Love With Anyone, Do This was an essay written by Mandy Len Catron where she referenced a psychologist’s study on love and whether or not intimacy can be deepened based on asking each other 36 questions.

The idea of the study is that you let yourself open up and be vulnerable with a person by answering a question or two that you wouldn’t normally be asked (even though they are topics we’ve all thought about from time to time but have never said anything about). The series jumps from a random question to a fun question to a personal, deep question and so on. You can find the full list of questions here, but here are some to get you thinking:

What would be considered a “perfect” day?
Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want to have as a dinner guest?
What roles do love and affection play in your life?
Do you have a secret hunch about how you will die?
Tell your partner what you like about them.
What is the great accomplishment of your life?
What do you value most in a friendship?
What is your favorite memory?
Is there something you’ve dreamed of doing for a long time but you’ve never done it? If so, what is it and why haven’t you done it?
Let’s say your house catches fire. Your loved one(s) and your pets are safe already. What is one thing you would save?

Intimate Questions For Couples For Rekindling The Spark

Looking to spice things up in the bedroom? Here are some romantic questions to ask each other and see if you’re on the same page about love and intimacy in your relationship.

What is your biggest fantasy?
What is your guilty pleasure?
Is there anything we haven’t tried that you would like to do?
Where, on your body, is your favorite place to be kissed?
What is the first thing you noticed about me?
Have you ever fantasized about another person joining us?
Have you ever used toys in the bedroom? If so, which one was your favorite?
Should we bring toys to the bedroom?
Does dirty talk turn you on?
Where is the weirdest place you’ve had sex?
What is your favorite thing to do in bed?
Have you ever had sex with another couple in the room?
When did you realize you were in love with me?
Do you think there’s a difference between having sex and making love?
How do you describe me to other people?
Do you like roleplay?
Have you ever gone skinny dipping?
Should we watch porn together?
What is something I do in bed that drives you wild, in the best way?
When am I at my sexiest?
What is your favorite part of my body? Touch it, rather than say it.

Questions To Ask Yourself About Your Relationship

If you’ve hitten a roadblock in your relationship or you’re starting to question the person you’re with, take some time for yourself and think about the answers to these questions. These are intimate, deep, serious questions you should be asking yourself about you and your relationship. (Remember, if you feel unsafe or scared by any means, talk to someone who can help you and get out of the relationship if need be.)