1. I’ve spent most of my life as a pushover — and am done with it. I’m done allowing people to walk over me. I’m done remaining silent when someone says something hurtful or offensive. Now that I’m finally standing up for myself, it causes problems in my friendships and relationships. Some people can’t handle the change. And there are some people I simply don’t want to put up with anymore now that I have raised my standards. There are some people who I have outgrown.

2. Life is too short to have the same arguments over and over again. I’m not going to keep getting mad at someone for disrespecting me. If they do it once, I might give them another shot. But if they repeat the behavior, then it doesn’t matter if they sputter out an apology. They clearly don’t mean what they’re saying. They clearly haven’t learned. They clearly don’t deserve a second of my time.

3. Differing opinions is one thing — but differing morals is another. I’ve been taught that it’s okay to have different opinions and that you shouldn’t judge others over what they choose to believe. But there’s a difference between a friend hating my favorite show — and hating a group of people. I don’t have time for racists or misogynists or homophobes or transphobes. I shouldn’t have to explain why someone’s life is worthwhile. I shouldn’t have to push you to care about other people.

4. They don’t bring much to my life, anyway. I’m not going to keep someone in my world, simply because we have history. If we don’t really get along now, if we barely talk to each other anyway, or if you bring me more stress than excitement, then there’s really no reason to keep you around. I don’t hate you. I’m not trying to hurt you. I’m simply moving on from you. I don’t have enough time or energy to entertain people who aren’t all that important to me.

5. I’m done playing nice to avoid confrontation. I don’t care if I come across as overly emotional or as a bitch or as difficult. I’m not going to let you make jokes at someone else’s expense. I’m not going to let you get away with being an asshole. Most of the time, people don’t like getting called out when they’re wrong. They don’t actually want to grow or better themselves. So when I’m not cutting others out, they’re cutting me out.

6. I deserve to feel comfortable. I’m not going to deal with someone who treats me disrespectfully. I’m not going to put myself through stress, just to seem polite. I don’t believe you should be forced to interact with someone toxic simply because they’re family or because you’ve known them forever. If you make me miserable, I’m cutting you out of my life. It doesn’t matter who you are. It matters how you make me feel.

7. It happens naturally. Sometimes I’m not actively trying to get rid of you. I just forget to text you. I forget to set plans with you. I’m so busy with my own life that you fade into the background. It’s nothing against you. It’s simply life.