1. You’re allowed to voice your opinion. You don’t have to keep your emotions bottled up inside in order to keep the peace. It’s not your responsibility to make other people comfortable. In fact, the best way to grow is by placing yourself in uncomfortable situations. Please, don’t hold back the way you feel because you’re worried other people are going to have a problem with your opinion. Speak your mind. Use your voice. Refuse to stay silent when you see something that upsets you.
2. It’s okay if some people dislike you. You might want everyone to smile when they see you walk into a room and consider you one of their closest friends — but you cannot please everyone. It’s impossible to make everyone happy, so you might as well stop trying. Remember, there’s a difference between being a nasty, unkind person who is rude to others and being a strong, independent person who speaks your mind. Stating your opinion isn’t impolite. It doesn’t make you a bitch. Anyone who says it does is only trying to silence you and you shouldn’t let that happen.
3. Bringing up your complaints can strengthen relationships. You’re doing yourself a disservice by staying quiet. Even though you might be worried about starting a fight with someone by bringing up the things that have been making you unhappy, voicing your opinion might not distance you from them. It might help you grow closer. After all, friendships and relationships require open communication. They won’t know how you’re feeling or how they should change if you don’t tell them what’s on your mind. You don’t have to talk to them in a nasty, combative way, but you do have to talk to them.
4. If your honesty chases people away, they weren’t meant to stay in your life anyway. If someone cares about you, they will want to talk to you about how you’re feeling. They will want to make compromises with you. They will want to fix whatever is wrong. If they run away the second things get complicated, then they weren’t worth your effort. They aren’t worth crying over.
5. What you might consider conflict could turn out to be a simple conversation. Disagreements don’t have to end in a fight. The other person might be highly receptive to what you have to say. They might be able to clear up a misunderstanding. They might extend an apology. The big blowup you’re imagining in your mind might not happen at all.
6. If you don’t speak up, you’re going to get taken advantage of by others. Unfortunately, your silence isn’t going to do you any favors. If you never speak up when others mistreat you, it doesn’t necessarily mean you’re the bigger person. It doesn’t necessarily mean you’re doing the right thing. Sometimes, it’s in your best interest to call someone out on what they’ve done wrong — or to walk away from them without a glance back. Although you might hate confrontation, you’re not going to be able to run from it forever.