1. You never actually get the chance to orgasm. Your partner shouldn’t be the only person who orgasms when you have sex. If you never get to finish, then you should take some time to teach your partner how you like to be touched. If you don’t even know the answer yourself, then you should spend some time figuring it out. You deserve to know what your body enjoys. You deserve to experience pleasure. Don’t keep pretending you’re perfectly fine with sex as long as your partner is happy. You’re supposed to be having a good time, too. And honestly, your partner is going to enjoy themselves more if they see you enjoying yourself, too.
2. You’ve grown bored because the sex is too predictable. Just because you’ve been with the same person for a long time doesn’t mean you have to have repeat performances in the bedroom. You can try new positions. New moves. New locations. New times of day. It sounds small, but something as simple as sleeping together in the mornings when you usually save it for bedtime can be a welcome change. You don’t have to do anything too kinky in order to revive your sex life (but there are plenty of kinky options, too).
3. You’re afraid to bring up concerns with your partner. If you’re comfortable enough to sleep with someone, you should be comfortable talking to them about sex. If there’s something new you want to try, you should tell them. If there’s something you haven’t been enjoying, you should tell them. You don’t have to be rude about it and hurt their feelings. But you should be as honest as possible. The more transparent you are, the better sex will be for the both of you.
4. You aren’t having sex with your partner nearly enough lately. Every relationship is different. Some couples have sex a few times a week. Some have sex a few times a month. And some have sex a few times a day. It doesn’t matter how frequently you’re sleeping together — but it does matter whether you’re happy. However, instead of jumping to conclusions about them cheating on you or losing interest in you, actually talk to them about the situation. Maybe they’ve been tired from work. Maybe they’ve been feeling insecure. Maybe they’ve been feeling under the weather. Or maybe you simply need to rearrange your schedules so you’re both ready for sex at the same time. There could be a simple solution — but you won’t know unless you talk to each other.
5. You don’t like the way your partner treats you during sex. Your person shouldn’t pressure you into situations that make you uncomfortable. They shouldn’t guilt trip you. They shouldn’t manipulate you. They shouldn’t compare you to exes. They shouldn’t comment on things you should change about your own body. They shouldn’t make you feel insecure inside or outside of the bedroom. If they do, that’s a pretty good reason to break up with them. They don’t deserve your body if they can’t respect it.