40 Invaluable Pieces Of Advice From People Over 40 Who Are Happy With Their Lives

Constantly chasing perfection will keep you permanently stressed. That doesn't mean you should not try to better your life, just know that if you expect perfection you will never be satisfied.

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These pieces of advice from Ask Reddit are invaluable.

1. Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts. Don’t put up with people who are reckless with yours.

2. Don’t worry about the future. Or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind, the kind that blindside you at 4 p.m. on some idle Tuesday.

3. Accept that perfection doesn’t exist. Your relationships will have problems, your car will break down, someone else will anyways have a better phone, a newer car, or a bigger house than you, no matter where on the social ladder you stand. Constantly chasing perfection will keep you permanently stressed. That doesn’t mean you should not try to better your life, just know that if you expect perfection you will never be satisfied.

4. Don’t waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you’re ahead, sometimes you’re behind. The race is long and, in the end, it’s only with yourself.

5. Don’t take advice or criticism as a personal attack.

6. Don’t fall for the trap that your life needs to be one long narrative that you should be building. Life is best when it’s a bunch of happy moments that just happen to be connected. Don’t try to make your life into a novel, make it a book of poems.

7. It is okay to not like someone. It is also okay to have someone not like you (people are going to not like you for no reason. That is okay. It’s a “them” issue and not a “you” issue). Don’t be an ass to everyone and give them reason to dislike you, but also know that you are under no obligation to put up with someone else’s bad friendship.

8. Try to start good habits. It is a little rough at first, but in a few years it will be second nature. Do this with things like cooking, cleaning, saving money, and self-care.

9. Money is important but it’s not the end all be all. It will not listen to your problems or hug you when you need it.

10. Comparison will rob you of joy. Be happy for others, but don’t feel you need to be like them.

11. Let go of the little things. Stress will kill you.

12. Chase your dreams! Life goes by SO fast. You don’t want to be 80 years old and regretting not traveling, pursuing your passion, etc.

13. Make a point of performing kind acts for others. It will greatly enrich your life.

14. Take care of your teeth. This is the only set you’re ever going to have and you don’t want to neglect them and mess them up. Brush and floss thoroughly every single day without exception. Hell, get an electric toothbrush. See the dentist regularly. Ditch the sugary drinks.

15. Maintain your friendships. In twenty years you will be so grateful for those people who saw you through marriages, children, illness and health. People who will go for a trip with you, love your kids, remember you as a young person.

Friends are essential but they require work. Don’t be alone just because you don’t want to be the person who reaches out to others.

16. Figure out what you want for yourself, and what you want for others. It will make planning and achieving it easier.

17. Time is very short, and as you get older it speeds up more and more.

18. Find something you love to do, and do that. Do it every day. It doesn’t matter if you make money at it, or get recognition because of it.

19. Experiences over materials items. You’re not going to remember that pair of shoes, or that expensive item or if you do, the memory won’t compare to that awesome adventure you went on, or that great night out.

20. You will have to deal with people. Learn how to leave them happy to have been in your presence, and you will not lack for friends and loved ones.

21. Don’t put yourself in ridiculous amounts of debt trying to portray a certain image. You’ll spend your entire life trying to get out of the hole you dug or you’ll have to declare bankruptcy.

22. Enjoy the days of your youth without going overboard. There is nothing wrong with having a good time, yet if you are always waking up wondering what happened last night, why you can’t remember how you spent so much money or you always have a hangover; you should tone it down a bit.

23. Use up ALL of your vacation time / sick time at work.

24. Social media is only an illusion.

25. Everyone is too focused on themselves to care about their opinion of you. So fuck what they think.

26. Relax more. Don’t get angry over little things.

27. Family is not necessarily blood, but instead who you would bleed for.

28. Forgive yourself first before forgiving others.

29. Get a regular exercise routine going and stick to it like your quality of life depends on it, because it does.

30. Go to another country that is far away and different than your own.

31. Never rely on your kids to make you happy. They will have to move on to their lives. Plan accordingly

32. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM.

33. You cannot change someone. Whether a friend or a partner, their faults will not “get better” and you cannot rescue them. Don’t waste your life on toxic people.

34. Don’t fight reality. Reality is all there is, don’t waste time wishing it was different. Don’t invent things that are not true. Reality is enough just as it is.

35. Everything you “get” becomes something you “have.” Learn how to be happy “having” things instead of “getting” them.

36. Don’t expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund. Maybe you’ll have a wealthy spouse. But you never know when either one might run out.

37. Remember compliments you receive. Forget the insults.

38. Three hobbies:

One to keep you in shape.

One to keep you creative.

One to make you money.

39. There is no shame in seeing a mental health professional.

40. Don’t marry someone because you think it’s something you have to do. The same goes with having children. Thought Catalog Logo Mark


About the author

January Nelson

January Nelson

January Nelson is a writer, editor, and dreamer. She writes about astrology, games, love, relationships, and entertainment. January graduated with an English and Literature degree from Columbia University.