If You’re Hiding These 7 Things From Them, They Aren’t Your Forever Person

If you're with your forever person, you should feel comfortable telling them the truth, even when it's complicated.

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1. Your feelings about them. When you’re with your forever person, you shouldn’t play guessing games. You shouldn’t send mixed signals. You should communicate with each other. You should be honest with each other. You should say exactly how you’re feeling without worrying about coming across too clingy or vulnerable or emotional. You should speak your mind, raise your voice, spill your soul.

2. Your baggage. Everyone feels a little broken. If you’re scared of admitting your mistakes and hiding your baggage from your person, then they aren’t going to understand certain moves you make. But if you let them know what you’ve been through, they’re going to understand where you’re coming from. They’re going to understand your fears. They’re going to understand how to navigate your relationship moving forward. And they’re going to feel much, much closer to you.

3. Your bad moods. Obviously you want your person to see the best sides of yourself. But if you hide in bathrooms whenever you cry and choose to vent to your friends about all your problems instead of leaning on them, then there could be a problem. While you don’t want to treat your person as a therapist, you do want to be authentic with them. Your relationship isn’t always going to be sunshine and rainbows — and neither is your mood. You have to be real with them. You have to go through the bad times with them as well as the good times.

4. Your old flames. You probably don’t want to go deep into your dating history. No one wants to hear too much about your exes. But if you’re purposely hiding the fact you hooked up with a certain someone (especially someone who is still in your life) then something is wrong. If you’re with your forever person, you should feel comfortable telling them the truth, even when it’s complicated.

5. Your expectations. You should be on the same page as your forever person. You should openly discuss what you want out of the relationship and where you see it heading. You shouldn’t be afraid to admit you’re looking for something serious. You shouldn’t be afraid to get real about pets and houses and children.

6. Your family drama. No family is perfect. Your forever person isn’t going to care if there’s some dysfunctional shit going on in your household. They’re going to be there for you. They’re going to support you. They’re going to help you get through it all. When you’re with your forever person, you shouldn’t feel the need to hide how crazy your family is in order to make yourself look better. You should be completely honest about where you come from because it isn’t going to change how the right person looks at you.

7. Your beautiful, natural self. In the beginning of a relationship, it’s normal to wear your nicest outfits and spend hours on your makeup and take twenty different selfies before choosing the right one to send them. But once you settle down with your forever person, you should be comfortable letting them see your real self. You shouldn’t have to wear makeup in front of them. You shouldn’t have to edit your photos for them. You shouldn’t have to do anything fancy to impress them. Thought Catalog Logo Mark


About the author

January Nelson

January Nelson

January Nelson is a writer, editor, and dreamer. She writes about astrology, games, love, relationships, and entertainment. January graduated with an English and Literature degree from Columbia University.