40 Hilarious Responses To ‘What Are Your Intentions With My Daughter?’

40 Hilarious Responses To ‘What Are Your Intentions With My Daughter?’

If your parents are about to meet your boyfriend, make sure he doesn’t use any of these lines from Ask Reddit.

1. Why? Do you want to join us?

2. Just using her to get to your wife.

3. Grow old with her until I get a piece of that inheritance.

4. Depends, what do you think I could get away with?

5. I intend to speak to her textually for a couple of weeks, maybe get drinks/dinner a time or two and then ultimately forget to continue our conversations and never speak to her again.

6. Get close with her… so I can get even closer with you, big boy.

7. To have her in bed by 10 and home by midnight.

8. How do you have a daughter and not know the answer to that question?

9. To strengthen the bond between our two mighty families.

10. Nothing sexual, sir. Just hard drugs and devil worship.

11. My intentions with your daughter are purely dishonorable.

12. Nothing she doesn’t consent to, sir.

13. Harvest her organs.

14. To bring her closer to my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

15. Use your imagination.

16. Ride that sweet ass to pound town, sir.

17. I’d tell you, but then you’d have to kill me.

18. Together, your daughter and I will be the strongest couple in the entire world! We will dominate the Earth.

19. I don’t intend to use a condom, sir.

20. Need a human shield for a bank job.

21. I’m gay, gonna give her ugly ass a makeover.

22. That’s up to her, now isn’t it?

23. What are YOUR intentions with MY daughter?

24. To finish what you started sir.

25. I’ll be encouraging her to drop that ass until she can’t no more.

26. Oh, she’s not the one I have intentions with, good sir.

27. To be her daddy, dad.

28. Smash, get the cash, then dash.

29. Making you some grandkids, but a lot of practice making them first.

30. What are your daughter’s intentions with me?

31. Honestly homie, I’m just here to hit and quit and she seems easy.

32. To savagely penetrate every orifice in her body, respectfully of course.

33. The same as yours on your first date with your lovely wife.

34. Smoking grass and eating ass.

35. I have high hopes and low expectations.

36. My goals are beyond your understanding.

37. We shall wine, dine, and 69.

38. Hopefully, if everything works out, she’ll join my D&D campaign and we can have a wonderful time!

39. I’m gonna fuck her brains out because that’s what she’s been asking for. You raised her well.

40. Intentions? I still can’t believe she said yes. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

January Nelson is a writer, editor, and dreamer. She writes about astrology, games, love, relationships, and entertainment. January graduated with an English and Literature degree from Columbia University.