1. The holidays are about spending time with your loved ones. That can be your family. Your friends. Your coworkers. Your pets. Whether or not you’re in a relationship during this time of year, you still have people around you who love you. And that’s all that matters.
2. If your single status doesn’t bother you, it doesn’t matter if it bothers your relatives. Don’t let anyone make you feel insecure about your single status. Maybe a few relatives will ask you about your love life and encourage you to settle down — but their opinion doesn’t matter. You shouldn’t feel bad that you’re alone. You should feel bad for them for assuming a relationship is the most important thing in the world.
3. It’s okay to be upset. Even if you consider yourself a strong, independent woman, you’re allowed to feel lonely from time to time. You’re allowed to be jealous of your cousins who are engaged or your grandparents who have been together since they were your age. You’re allowed to want a relationship. Even if you’re generally happy being single, you’re not going to be happy every single second.
4. The movies aren’t real. Around this time of year, it’s hard to avoid the love songs and the holiday movies about perfect families. But reality is messy. Reality isn’t anything like those films. Don’t compare yourself to what you see on your computer screen because real life is never going to live up to the hype.
5. You don’t need a relationship to have fun. Even though you don’t have anyone to kiss beneath the mistletoe or when the ball drops, you can still drink some egg nog and sing carols and swap gifts. Nothing is stopping you from having a good time!
6. Your timeline isn’t going to match anyone else’s. Maybe your siblings are getting married soon. Maybe your cousins already have children. Maybe some people in your family are younger than you and have already hit milestones you aren’t even close to reaching — but that doesn’t matter. Their life isn’t your life. You’re on two completely different paths. You’re not competing with them. You should be happy for them.
7. This time of year is lonely for everyone. You might feel like you’re the only one in the world who is feeling this sad around the holidays, but that’s far from the truth. A lot of people are in the same situation as you. They’re feeling left out and lonely. They’re wondering if they’re going to spend every Christmas this way. They’re convinced they’re the only one in the world experiencing this overwhelming feeling, but they’re not alone and neither are you.
8. So much can change in a year. Right now, you might feel like you’re going to be unhappy forever, but this time next year might be completely different. Think about how different everything was a year ago. A lot can change in a year, so don’t give up hope of finding happiness. This Christmas might be rough, but next Christmas might be the best one yet.