50 Things Only Introverts Who Love Being Alone Will Understand

50 Things Only Introverts Who Love Being Alone Will Understand

You are allowed to turn down plans to spend time in your bedroom alone. It’s okay if you prefer your own company. These people from Ask Reddit feel the exact same way.

1. Sometimes I dread hanging out with friends even if I like them A LOT, just because I just enjoy my alone time and socializing can be tiring.

2. “Being alone together” is very much a thing in a relationship and is something important if one or both partners are introverts.

You can be in the same room, each doing their own thing, but still silently enjoy each other’s company.

3. I almost always secretly wish that people will cancel. When I do go I’m always happy I did but when someone cancels it makes me feel relieved.

4. The love of finding another person that appreciates silence and doesn’t go “well this is awkward” every time there is a fucking pause in a conversation.

5. Some people are not as draining as others and it has nothing to do with how much I like you. People I don’t like are consistently draining, but I have some people whom I like – for example, my roommate – who are incredibly draining, and others who are energy neutral.

6. Just because I turn down 99% of your offers to hang out doesn’t mean I don’t appreciate the thought… And it certainly doesn’t mean I will never say yes.

7. That getting time by myself will allow be to be more engaged when I am with others. Constantly being around people causes me to withdraw more and more from interaction.

8.Alone does not mean lonely.

9. Just because we want space or we don’t want to talk at the moment doesn’t mean we don’t like you. Some times we just need a break.

10. Being in your own company and thoughts is very different at first but it’s great and you learn a lot about yourself as a person, and silence is just pure bliss.

11. The freedom.

I don’t want to cater to anyone.

I don’t want to be judged.

I just want to RELAX.

12. The NEED for silence. The enjoyment of feeling like you are the only one left in the world. That silence being broken by the outside world. A car door slam. A neighbor’s barking dog that wont shut up. The guy with the lawnmower. The loud thumping radio of a vehicle as it drives by.

It can be maddening.

13. That animal friends are just as good as (and maybe even better than) people friends.

14. Just because I prefer being alone doesn’t mean I’m awkward or antisocial. I like meeting new people, I just don’t wanna go to your party with 50 people I don’t know, when I can have a quiet fishing trip alone.

15. We have to “recharge” or “decompress” after exerting ourselves socially. When I come home from work I need an hour or so of just being with myself, having a bath or looking at my phone or something. It’s like my social battery is dead and I need to be plugged in. It’s even worse after parties or gatherings.

16. One thing I just find exhausting is pretending to care about something or some topic. It’s why I don’t like meeting new people.

‘Sorry Gary I couldn’t give two shits on the pasta sauce you made last night and what process you went through to get it like you wanted.’

17. If I go out of my way to spend time with you, you must be important to me.

18. There’s a certain beauty within isolation, not sure how to describe it, but it really is something amazing everyone will hopefully some day experience and learn to cherish and appreciate.

Sure, being with people is great, but being alone can be great too, if not better.

19. There is a sense of control I guess you could call it. You sit alone in your house and nothing is going wrong. You can truly de-stress yourself.

20. There is nothing wrong with me; I prefer my own company, and if I want to do something with someone else, it will be with a person who doesn’t spend most of their time being whiny, needy, nosy, or bitchy. The only people I’ve ever met who resent or refuse to understand my nature are ones whose company is, in large doses, undesirable.

21. You can feel more alone with people than just being by yourself. Also, you can have more fun hanging out with yourself than being hanging out in a group of people.

22. I love hanging out with people, but only if we’re doing something. This can be board games, making something artistic, working on homework, anything.

The concept of a “party” where the whole goal is supposed to be just talking always baffled me. It still does.

23. Doorbells are fucking monsters.

24. Extrovert: around a lot of people = energy boost.

Introvert: around a lot of people = energy drain.

Alone time = energy recalibration.

25. If I’m close enough to you, and I tell you it feels like I’m alone when I’m with you, it’s actually a good thing.

26. That I (we) am/are not lonely at all. My life is whole, beautiful and complete. And just because I’m extremely outgoing and engaging doesn’t mean that I can do that 24 hours daily. “You don’t act like you prefer to be alone”. Because I exist to make other people’s lives better. But once I’m inside my home, I’m more than done because I live for other people for a living. Engaging with them outside of being their nurse is work for me because I can’t turn off my compulsion to care. So, no, we aren’t on the verge of suicide or walking around like Delia Deets. We have great lives.

27. It’s not an awkward pause, it’s a comfortable silence.

28. You can genuinely like being alone, but can also hate being lonely.

29. I don’t care if you want to hang out or not but I do not want to listen your bullshit complaints about work and the woes of dating, etc.. Or if you’re glued to your mobile device. You keep checking that shit like you’re expecting a baby any moment and I’m out. I expend mental energy just being out and about; blabbering about your petty bullshit is annoying and toxic and makes me irritable. That’s what your mother is there for. I spend time with friends to escape from the rat race, not to keep it up. If I wanted to hear about how shelly doesn’t listen when you talk or Steve keeps pissing you off with the personal drama or how Carol always shows up late every day I would sit with my old lady and watch her drink a bottle of wine.

30. It’s not that I don’t miss you, it’s just i need some time for myself too. A lot of friends think i avoid them or ignore them when i just.. need some me time. Away from my phone.

31. That pets are fantastic company. I have a lot of people who think it’s lame to enjoy spending time with your dog over people but I really enjoy it.

32. It’s honestly a choice. I get that a lot of people have fun going out and being social, but I honestly enjoy my private time at home.

33. I actually appreciate the people in my life more when I’m alone than when I’m physically around them. Strange but true.

34. Being an ambivert, I do have times where I can be extremely social however I find it very draining and tiresome very quickly. I’m also an INFJ – I find social situations to be awkward, and sometimes just find it easier to be by myself as I can’t express my properly without being looked at like I’m weird.

35. I need the alone time to process and organize my thoughts… And also I like the freedom of doing whatever I want to do!

36. How empowering your own company can be. Many of your solutions can come out of spending time alone.

37. I work with you, and we have a great friendship at work. But please don’t make me keep refusing your invitation to hang out on weekends. Take it for what it is.

38. Just because we’re together/ in close approximation, doesnt mean there is a need for constant conversation.

I don’t care if you’re 3 feet away from me, let me do my own thing.

39. People who prefer to be alone I think are more quiet. They listen and observe more. And I think a lot of us are better than most at reading people.

40. There’s no anxiety when you’re alone. You can focus, think, relax, whatever you want…

41. Bad company makes you feel lonelier. Extroverts don’t seem to understand it, and I don’t understand that they don’t understand.

42. Going to the movies alone is so much better.

43. Not wanting to hangout with you sometimes doesn’t mean I don’t like you

I literally just need to chill out and be alone sometimes, it’s nothing personal against anyone.

44. That feeling of charging your energy by having a me time is so rewarding. Especially after work.

Prioritizing things to do alone like cooking, savoring the taste of the food, and then journaling, or even learning the chords of the guitar, and sleeping, gives me so much awareness to surroundings that it relaxes me.

45. The stress associated with not having a reaction to anything that someone is saying. Recounting mundane anecdotes, trite jokes, ordinary, predictable human behavior, and you’re over there like “… yeeeahh…” I don’t want to be a dick, but how the fuck could I possible care about this? But since I don’t want to be a dick, I better disingenuously “ha ha… Oh ain’t it always the way?… It’s like, come on.”

46. The mind of people who are silent work better that way and they feel uncomfortable when placed in chaos or cannot perform at their optimum.

47. You can be sociable but also appreciate your alone time.

48. There is a real high to driving home after work on a Friday knowing there will be an empty house waiting for you.

49. The importance of silence. Socializing can be extremely noisy, and some people find that tiring even if nothing else tiring is going on. “Prefer” is the correct word: I can and do socialize, but there is a cost attached, and sometimes the cost is too high for any possible benefit.

50. Plans on the weekend consists of hanging out with no one, but yourself.

May seem heartbreaking when in reality it’s the best feeling after a long week dealing with people and their b.s. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

January Nelson is a writer, editor, and dreamer. She writes about astrology, games, love, relationships, and entertainment. January graduated with an English and Literature degree from Columbia University.