1. Her phone when off and she asked me what it said. I looked at it and it said, “I wanna bend you over and spank you.”
2. Found my wife’s notebook. Written on the first page was a 10-step plan detailing how she was going to leave me for another guy. I turned it into one step.
3. I returned from work on Christmas Eve. we had tickets to a festival which started the day before nye and I couldn’t find the tickets anywhere after seeing them the month before. I decided to double check the trash before we put it out for collection. I found a used condom… we lived on our own.
4. Girlfriend ran over her phone by accident and destroyed the screen. Asked me to backup all her stuff and transfer it to her new Pixel. Use backup tool that captures all sorts of dirty messages and nudes with another guy.
5. We had a linked apple account, we both had the find my iPhone app. Figured out what all the late nights at work really were.
6. He gave my number to his side chick in case of emergency and she “accidentally” called me instead of him.
7. We were engaged and he had a drinking problem. He was blacked out drunk, accidentally butt dialed me, and I listened to the whole thing only to find out after that it was with a prostitute.
8. He was all dressed up just to go out with the guys, I looked down the street and saw her sitting in her car waiting for him. He picked a fight with me so he could storm out. I knew who she was from the naked picture I found.
9. Her phone got a text from her friend who was in the kitchen with her. So I assumed one of them sent it to me, opened her phone to see a penis. Her friend doesn’t have a penis. Now I’m divorced and don’t trust texts from friends.
10. Woke up to her on her phone with hearts scrolling in Facebook Messenger. We were married 7 years at that point. 2 kids. It was my birthday.
11. Boyfriend finally convinces me to have a threesome after months of begging. I finally agree and our mutual friend comes over. Things get hot and heavy and when he starts fucking her he moans, “Damn you feel even better than usual!” Everyone freezes. He tries to tell me that he was thinking about my pussy while fucking her and that it just felt differently, but she felt so guilty that she confessed on the spot and begged me to forgive her. We don’t really talk anymore but last I heard she had been dating my ex for over a year.
12. I caught my ex thanks to fucking Pokemon Go of all things. She mentioned Pokemon Go was using lots of her data. I explained that in her settings she could see how much data an app was using. I proceeded to show her and proved to her it wasn’t by pointing out Tinder was using much more data…
13. Was going to post a cute little note on his facebook for our 6month wedding anniversary. Accidentally caught him messaging his ex about how awful of a wife I am and how he missed her. Decided to dig further (stupid me) and saw that he had a tinder for a week while I was taking care of my mother as well as visiting backpage multiple times. And then I found a condom under our bed. My stupid ass forgave him.
14. Christmas Eve I went into the computer to find a photo for a last minute gift, an ornament with a family photo I did for her as a tradition every year. Instead found a love letter from some guy at the gym to her. Then kept looking and founds tons more. Over the next year , it just got worse and worse to a point you’d never believe.
15. Get in his car. The seat was pushed all the way back and there’s a bracelet on the floor. First thing I asked was if he had cleaned off the seat when he had finished. He said yes. Then he realized he was talking to his girlfriend, not one of the many friends who knew about his affair. The best part is we were all packed up for a weekend out of town for his cousin’s wedding. His parents were in the car behind us. I went. We didn’t speak the entire weekend.
16. My cousin was visiting us for a long weekend. She and I were super close, like sisters. I went upstairs to put the baby to bed, came back down to them going at it on the couch. So that was fun.
17. One day my husband was getting ready for work and I saw him packing his GoPro case so he could take it to work. I thought, “hmmm that’s weird, why would he be taking it to work?” So, when he jumped into the shower, I replaced his GoPro with mine and thought I’d look through the files when he leaves for work. My suspicions were on alert because he had just taken a trip to the PI with some friends. A guys only weekend kind of thing. Fire up the camera and found 3 videos… Lo and behold.. there he is in all his glory barebacking a Filipino prostitute. Looking and posing for the camera like he’s some fucking porn star. I was enraged but also looking at this fool acting like he’s a fucking adult film star was hilarious.
18. I got a new job with a cell phone company. Free phone for me 15 a month for her. First bill comes in with call detail. She was on the phone an hour a day with this number while supposedly at work. I call, dude answers. I hang up. I ask her, she lies and said it was a gal pal of hers. I told her I know she is lying and call it again. Dude answers.
19. Had been on the road for work. Was supposed to be 10 days, got to go home a day early. Had a friend pick me up at the airport to surprise my wife and 2 children (2years and 8 months). Walked in to my ex and her ‘coffee friend’ snuggling on the couch. With. My. Kids. In. The. Same. Room. I was livid. Of course she denied everything. We split up weeks later.
20. Went home and my husband wasn’t home, which was weird for him at 8pm, when an hour earlier he had told me he was going home. Had a gut feeling, went to one of his female friends’ (who he claimed was like a sister) apartment, his truck is there. I knock. No answer. Try the door, its unlocked. Walk into the living room, nobody there. Hear noises in the bedroom. Walk in and lo and behold, there they are. Tried to make it work over next couple of months, but I can’t get past it, didn’t even want him to touch me. Divorced 4 years ago.
21. Came back from a trip four hours early. Wife was supposed to be at work still. Opened the front door to see her sitting topless on the couch making out with a coworker. He ran out the door; she ran into a bathroom and locked the door. Sat on that couch for about an hour because I couldn’t think what else to do. Finally just up and left, so she could come out of the bathroom and put a shirt on.
22. Me and my girlfriend were long distance and she had a habit of going quiet sometimes. She’d been texting me for the last few weeks but had made excuses not to come visit. I went to a party that my friend had organised. I met a friend of his who told me he had a new girlfriend. I was surprised he hadn’t mentioned her, so I asked who she was. This lady introduced me to my girlfriend. She’d told everyone that we broke up, and had been dating my friend for about a month. She didn’t bother to tell me.
23. On family vacation, I picked up his phone because I was bored and the kids were playing on mine. Saw a message to some girl describing the sex he and I had the night before. Spent the rest of the vacation fighting via text while trying (and failing) to act normal.
24. Went to send a Snapchat on his story from his phone, saw his best friend was another girl. Checked his texts, suspicions confirmed.
25. Five months pregnant. I show up with herpes. He didn’t even care enough about our kid to wrap up his dick. Our kid is healthy btw. Thank God.
26. I had access to her Google location through her account, and watched her little GPS dot go to his apartment at 10pm and then watched it leave at 10am. Probably one of my lowest of lows.
27. The condoms and rent money were missing because someone “broke in” and stole them. No, the condoms were missing because you were fucking someone else, and the rent money was missing because you are a drug addict. BYE.
28. My girlfriend was a foreign student. I was googling her name out of curiosity and found the blog of her long distance boyfriend, talking in detail of their loving relationship. Turns out I was the sidepiece.
29. I pulled up yahoo on our shared desktop computer and had an email from his best friend. I read it and realized that it was an email from friend to my husband… giving him advice about the girl he fell in love with that wasn’t me.
30. My husband changed his cell phone from our joint plan to hers. Verizon sent me an email confirming the change and the account his line was added to, which included her name. I asked him, and he lied. I looked her up on Facebook, and it turns out they had just celebrated their 2 year dating anniversary. We had just celebrated 8 years of marriage.