16 Signs Someone Would Actually Want To Date You

Be cool, guys. You don’t have to rush into anything too fast. You can work on yourself and find out what you like and what you desire out of a partner. There is no finish line you have to cross. And, it’s really important that you become someone that a person wants to date instead of demanding someone live up to who you want. Be the best version of yourself and attract likeminded people. That sounds pretty great, huh?

1. You’re a relatively chill person to be around. You’re not sitting around demanding everyone cater to your every need and whim.

2. You are comfortable enough with yourself to be able to tell the truth, be honest about how you feel, and generally not be a monster when it comes to intimacy with another person.

3. You know that you need to give as much as you demand and, actually, come to think of it, maybe you don’t need to enter any new relationship just demanding shit all the time. Just chill. Let it unfold.

4. You don’t have insane expectations about who you want to be with. All you want is to be with someone you think is fucking awesome.

5. …And you want to have sex with them, talk, do fun things, watch things, eat things. That’s pretty much it and that pretty much sounds perfect.

6. You’re actually ready to let someone in. You want someone to know all the parts of you and to know someone else. Simple.

7. You’re not interested in all the bullshit games of modern dating. If you’re into someone, you’re going to say it and you’re going to say what you want. End of story.

8. …And you’re ready to walk away if someone doesn’t want what you want. It’s not the end of the world and you’re not going to take it as a rejection. You’re past all that.

9. Whatever you expect from someone else, you’ll do yourself, as well. You’re not sitting around expecting the world to revolve around your needs and desires.

10. You like yourself. You like being alone. But you’re also open to meeting someone because making out on the reg is great, too.

11. You’re not expecting someone to come along and complete your life or give your life meaning. You’ve got all that yourself and wouldn’t want to put all that pressure on someone.

12. …You’re also not looking for someone to make you happy. You’re happy. You just also like having consistent sex with someone who’s funny and cool and interesting.

13. You are pretty clear on what you want and you’re not interested in stringing someone along while you deal with your indecisiveness.

14. You’ve mostly dealt with all your big baggage. Sure, you’re always growing and learning about yourself, but you don’t have a bunch of hangups that would prevent you from getting close to someone for real.

15. You really want to share your life with someone, not because you need someone, but because you genuinely want someone. *shrug*

16. You’re truly capable of giving as much as you take, if not more. You are capable of learning from mistakes, forgiving, and sticking it out even when it’s difficult. You aren’t looking for some fantasy in your mind, but the real thing, a real person. You’re willing to put in the work if it gets to that point and you just want to find a partner in crime who you can also have sex with and make out with. Bliss! TC mark

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Jamie Varon

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Trace the scars life has left you. It will remind you that at one point, you fought for something. You believed.

“You are the only person who gets to decide if you are happy or not—do not put your happiness into the hands of other people. Do not make it contingent on their acceptance of you or their feelings for you. At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter if someone dislikes you or if someone doesn’t want to be with you. All that matters is that you are happy with the person you are becoming. All that matters is that you like yourself, that you are proud of what you are putting out into the world. You are in charge of your joy, of your worth. You get to be your own validation. Please don’t ever forget that.” — Bianca Sparacino

Excerpted from The Strength In Our Scars by Bianca Sparacino.

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