How To Know If It’s A Summer Fling Or The Real Thing

It’s only a fling if they refuse to talk about their feelings for you.

By

How To Know If It’s A Summer Fling Or The Real Thing

The Summer I Turned Pretty is a coming-of-age Amazon show based on the popular novel trilogy by Jenny Han. It follows a teenager who experiences her first love and heartbreak over the perfect summer. If you end up having your own summer romance this year, here are some surefire ways to tell whether it’s a summer fling or the real thing.

It’s the real thing if you find yourselves talking seriously about the future.

If you’re only going to be together for the summer, then you’re only going to be making plans for a few days, or maybe weeks, into the future. You might talk about hypothetical dates you would go on in the future, but nothing is set in stone. However, if it’s the real thing, then you’re going to be figuring out how to make the relationship work beyond the summer. You’re going to be setting plans for months later because you plan to keep each other in your lives permanently.

It’s only a fling if you aren’t putting an official label on the relationship.

If this person keeps making excuses about how they don’t like labels or about how they want to keep their options open, then your relationship is probably not going to last much longer than a season. After all, if they want to keep you in their life forever, then they’re going to be clear about their feelings. They’re going to make a real commitment and put an official label on the relationship, so you can start your journey as a couple.

It’s the real thing if you develop a deep, emotional connection.

Summer flings are about passion. You’ll spend most of your time together kissing and holding hands, enjoying your physical connection. However, if it’s the real thing, then they are going to let their walls down completely. They’re going to open up about their deepest secrets, fears, hopes, and dreams, then ask you about yours. They’re going to give you access to every side of themselves, not only the surface layers.

It’s only a fling if you never spend time alone together.

Even though it’s fun to hang out with big groups of friends, especially over the summer, you’re never going to develop a deep connection if there are always other people around. Remember, make-out sessions shouldn’t be the only time when you’re alone together. If you’re always hanging out in big groups, and only sneaking off for kisses, then it’ll be hard to get to know each other as well as a couple should. However, if it’s the real thing, then you’ll go out on actual dates. You’ll spend one-on-one time together. You’ll make time for each other.

It’s the real thing if they post about you online.

If they’re keeping you a secret, then there’s a good chance you’re only a fling and they want to look like they’re still single so they don’t lose their chance with anyone else. But if they delete their dating apps and post pictures of you on social media, making it clear you’re a couple, then it’s the real thing. They’re showing you off because they’re proud to be with you. They’re excited to start their love story with you.

It’s only a fling if they are always inviting you out at the last minute.

If they refuse to set plans in advance, they’re probably waiting to see what other options come along. They’re probably only inviting you out when they’re bored and lonely, when they have nothing better on the agenda. Of course, you shouldn’t be a backup plan. You should be the first person they want to hang out with when they have free time.

It’s the real thing if they introduce you to their family.

No one is going to bring you around their parents on purpose if they’re planning on walking away once the summer is done. If they’ve invited you to family parties and are introducing you to all their favorite people, then they are picturing you as a permanent part of their life.

It’s only a fling if they refuse to talk about their feelings for you.

Even if they like you, a relationship is never going to work if they aren’t sharing their thoughts and feelings. Someone who really wants to be with you won’t be shy about how much they care about you and how much you mean to them. So if they never give you compliments or talk about how much they like you, then there’s a chance it’s only a fling and their attraction is more physical than emotional.

It’s the real thing if they’re putting in as much effort as you are.

If they want to be a permanent part of your world, they’ll show you that they care through their words and their actions. They’ll put effort into initiating conversations, keeping conversations going, planning dates, and making you smile. If they’re actively trying, it’s a good sign. It means they want you around forever, not only for the summer.