Even If You've Been Together Forever, Put Effort Into Your Person

Even If You’ve Been Together Forever, Put Effort Into Your Person

Even if you’ve been together forever, even if you’re married, even if your person clearly knows how you feel about them, make sure you say the words aloud. Never forget to remind them how much they mean to you. Never forget to give them cuddles and kisses and kind words.

Your partner deserves to feel wanted. They deserve to feel attractive. They deserve to feel seen. Even though they already know you’re madly in love with them, there’s no harm in reminding them. Compliment them. Make a move on them. Refresh their memory on how crazy you are about them.

You never want your partner to feel neglected, like they’re a bother, or like you’re only with them because you feel obligated to stay. You want them to feel special. You want them to know your feelings about them haven’t changed over time. 

You shouldn’t stop putting effort into your relationship once you’re confident your person is going to stay. You shouldn’t assume your hard work is over because you’ve landed the person of your dreams. You shouldn’t stop trying because you feel like you’ve already won.

You should continue to put in effort every single day. You should make sure you treat your person with as much love and kindness as you gave them in the beginning. Don’t let yourself slack. Don’t assume you can get lazy because they aren’t going to leave you. Give them the attention they deserve, even if you won’t get anything out of it.

You’re supposed to be the one person your partner can count on, so when they are struggling, make sure you support them. Encourage them. Be there for them the way they’ve always been there for you. Don’t assume they would come to you if they need anything. Ask them if they’re okay. Ask them if they need anything. Keep an open dialogue with them. Keep the lines of communication open.

Even when your partner is in a great mood and everything is going well, you should send them a sweet text. Pick them up a small present. Bake them their favorite dessert. Write them a love note. Show them you’re willing to put in the effort to make their smile grow wider.

You can’t suddenly stop putting effort into the relationship once you get comfortable. You can’t assume your partner is okay with a lack of romance because you’re no longer in the puppy love phase.

Even if you’ve been together for decades and there’s no end in sight, your person deserves to feel beautiful. They deserve to feel spoiled. They deserve to feel valued.

Your person might not expect you to perform romantic gestures at this point in your relationship, that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t do it. Surprise them. Show them that you aren’t going to stop trying to impress them. Show them that all those nice things you did for them early on aren’t going to stop now that you’re together. This is only the beginning. There’s so much more in store. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

About the author

Holly Riordan

Holly is the author of Severe(d): A Creepy Poetry Collection.