Never settle for someone who refuses to take responsibility for their choices because they are never going to better themselves. Instead of reflecting on the things they’ve done and putting in the effort to change their bad behaviors, they are going to place the blame elsewhere. They are going to pin their problems on their exes, their parents, their bosses, their friends. They are going to act like they never do anything wrong, like it is never their fault, like they were pushed into making decisions based on the people surrounding them.
People like this are never going to give you the whole truth. They will give you their version of the truth. They might not even realize they’re lying to you, but they will spin situations in order to make themselves seem innocent. They will distort reality in order to fit their own narrative.
You will never be able to tell whether they are being straightforward with you. All you’ll know for sure is that if they cannot be honest with themselves, you can’t expect them to be honest with you. You cannot trust them. You cannot rely on them to paint a realistic portrait of the world.
If you settle for someone who refuses to take responsibility for their own choices, you are never going to win arguments. They are never going to meet you in the middle and come to compromises. You are never going to hear them say sorry or admit they’ve done something wrong. They are going to find a way to turn every argument around on you. They are going to decide you’re the one who messed up, you’re the one who caused drama, you’re the one who escalated the situation.
People like this are never going to rise to your expectations because they refuse to see their faults. They refuse to look at their life without bias. In their eyes, every single shitty thing that has ever happened to them was someone else’s fault. Nothing was brought on by their actions. Bad things happened to them, not because of them.
These people are going to feel like they’re under attack whenever you try to have a serious conversation with them. They are going to get defensive as soon as it seems like you might be upset with them. Whenever something good happens, they will claim responsibility, but if something bad happens, they will claim they have nothing to do with it.
These people aren’t worth your effort, because a relationship is never going to work if you are unable to be honest with each other. If you are unable to admit when you screwed up and vow to do better in the future. If you are unable to own your shit.
Never settle for someone who refuses to take responsibility for their choices. Never settle for someone who refuses to better themselves each and every day. Never settle for someone who would rather pretend they’re perfect to avoid hurting themselves than work on themselves to avoid hurting you.