Bottling up your feelings will end in resentment. Right now, you might be trying to convince yourself that you can handle these emotions on your own, that they’re not that big of a deal, that you’ll get over it soon, that there’s no reason to start any drama.
But if you don’t bring up what is bothering you now, your relationship is never going to change. Your person is goin to continue repeating those same hurtful actions because they have no idea they’re hurting you. They have no idea you are doing your best not to explode.
Bottling up your feelings will end in confusing arguments. You might not verbally admit what’s bothering you to your person, but your feelings are going to come out one way or another. Maybe you’ll snap at them about something small. Maybe you’ll grow distant from them. Maybe you’ll get super quiet. Either way, bottling up your feelings isn’t going to help you avoid a fight. It’s going to lead to another fight, a nastier one, one that doesn’t even make any sense because it’s not about the real issue at hand.
Bottling up your feelings will lead you down a dangerous road, one where you believe it’s okay to settle. But you shouldn’t allow someone to get away with hurting you. You shouldn’t ignore your pain because you’re probably overreacting anyway. You shouldn’t give someone permission to treat you like crap without speaking up for yourself.
You’re allowed to talk about your feelings. You’re allowed to approach someone who hurt you and explain the situation from your point of view. You’re allowed to request better treatment in the future.
Bottling up your feelings is going to backfire on you. It’s going to slowly pull you apart from your person. If you feel like you can’t talk to each other, that means you can’t really trust each other. That means you aren’t going to last long.
Remember, relationships are supposed to be about showing each other your true, uncensored selves. You’re not supposed to be pretending around them. You’re not supposed to tell little white lies. Your person shouldn’t expect you to be emotionless. Your person shouldn’t judge you for acting vulnerable in front of them.
Bottling up your feelings will end in a breakup. If you want to stay with your person, then you need to tell them what is running through your mind. You can’t expect them to play guessing games. And you can’t hold your opinions inside because you are worried about looking silly, either.
No matter how awkward and uncomfortable the conversation might feel, you cannot keep anything from your partner. You cannot hold secrets or grudges. You need to be open with them. You need to stop bottling up your feelings because keeping the peace right now will hurt you in the long-run. Meanwhile, actually gathering the courage talking about your feelings is going to strengthen you as a couple. It’s going to make you an even better team.