You’re allowed to love someone from afar. You’re allowed to walk away from them if they aren’t supportive of your life choices, if they make you feel worse every time you have a conversation with them, if they are no longer serving a positive purpose in your universe.
You are allowed to love someone without speaking to them every single day — or speaking to them at all. You can still cherish the good times you had together while refusing to make anymore memories in the future. You can still appreciate the role they played in your life back when they treated you well without allowing them to treat you terribly now and in the future.
You have to stop assuming the way things always were are the way they need to continue to be. Your history with someone doesn’t tether you to them forever. You are allowed to say goodbye at any point in time. You are allowed to rebuild your social circle from scratch. You are allowed to weed out the people who have been bringing you down and find new people who lift you up and encourage you to reach your fullest potential.
Stop forcing yourself to get along with someone. Stop staying in an uncomfortable situation because you’re worried about looking rude or being accused of overreacting. You don’t have to have a huge falling out with someone in order for you to cut them out of your world. You don’t need to explain yourself to anyone. If someone has been slowly eating away at your sanity, making mean jabs here and there, undervaluing you as a person and disrespecting you as a whole, then you are allowed to create distance between yourself and their negativity.
You shouldn’t allow someone who supposedly cares about you to doubt your dreams, your choices, your potential. You shouldn’t allow someone who supposedly wants the best for you to tear you down and make you feel lesser than them. You shouldn’t allow someone who supposedly couldn’t live without you to treat you like garbage, like you are worthless and weak. You shouldn’t allow anyone — no matter how long you’ve known them or what their relation is to you — to make you feel like you don’t matter.
If you’re feeling beaten down and underestimated by someone you love, you are allowed to love them from afar. You are allowed to say, “I care about you. I want what’s best for you. And I am going to miss you. But you no longer deserve a space in my heart or my mind.”
Putting yourself first might seem harsh, but really, you’re putting your mental health first. You’re putting your own sanity first. You’re putting your chance at happiness first.
You are allowed to step away from people who are hurting your confidence, your heart, and your soul. You are allowed to push away the people who are making it harder for you to love yourself. You are allowed to love them from afar.