You might think playing hard to get is mysterious, intriguing, sexy — but it’s not doing anything for me.
When you take an hour to answer my texts, it’s not putting me on the edge of my seat, making me wonder what you’re doing and whether you’re with another woman. It’s not making me want you even more. It’s doing the exact opposite. It’s giving me incentive not to text you again.
I don’t want to be treated like a backup plan. I don’t want to be pushed to the sidelines. I don’t want to feel like I’m bothering you with my affection.
If you’re going days without answering me, I’m going to assume you don’t feel all that strongly about me. Your lack of interest isn’t going to convince me to double my effort. It’s going to convince me me to stop trying, to leave you alone, to search for someone else who seems excited by me.
It’s the same when you cancel plans with me — or keep talking about how we need to make plans soon and never actually set a date to see me. If you aren’t putting any effort into getting to know me, I’m going to assume you have someone else. I’m going to assume your priorities are placed elsewhere.
I’m sorry, but your flimsy compliments and Instagram likes aren’t enough to keep me interested. I have better things to do than chase after hearts who don’t seem like they want to be caught.
I’m not going to waste my time trying to crack through your shell. I’m not going to make it my mission to get you to love me. I would rather be with someone who sees my worth from the start, who doesn’t need a push in order to agree to date me.
The more mixed signals you send, the more you mess with my head, the faster I’m going to lose interest. Your unanswered texts and fickle hangout sessions aren’t making me want you more. They’re making me like you less. They’re making me wonder why someone like you caught my eye in the first place.
If you answer my texts within a reasonable amount of time, set plans to hang out with me, and generally treat me like you actually give a damn, then I’m going to return the favor. I’m going to spoil you rotten. I’m going to make you feel handsome, loved, and appreciated.
But I’m not going to fluff your ego by chasing after you when you don’t seem interested in me. I’m not going to play detective and try to figure out whether your mixed signals mean you want to date me or you only want to string me along.
I like you — but I’m not going to follow you around like a puppy, begging for your affection. I’m not going to get down on my hand and knees, pleading for you to give me a chance.
If you don’t pay attention to me, I’ll do the same.