Stop searching for someone who is going to put up with you and all of the baggage that comes along with you. Stop assuming whoever ends up dating you is settling. Anyone would be lucky to have you. You have to keep telling yourself that until you actually start to believe it.
Your opinion of yourself matters. If you have a negative view of yourself, then you’re going to settle for people who treat you poorly. You’re not going to get annoyed when someone gives you a backhanded compliment or goes missing for three straight days without sending you a text because you’ll feel like you deserve to be treated that way. Besides, you’ll be happy they’re willing to deal with you in the first place, so you won’t want to complain about ‘minor’ things. You won’t want to chase them away by asking for more than you feel like you deserve.
Hating yourself is dangerous — and assuming no one is ever going to love you is even more dangerous because the second someone gives you affection, you’re going to settle for them. You’re not going to ask yourself whether this person is the right person for you, whether they treat you right, whether they make you happy. You’re just going to be excited someone is willing to stick around. You’re going to take whatever you can get.
You need to change the way you think about yourself, the way you refer to yourself, the way you treat yourself. Otherwise, if you keep trash talking yourself, then you’re not going to be turned off when someone else starts trash talking you. You’re going to think of it as normal. You’re going to think it’s what you deserve. And that couldn’t be further from the truth.
Even though you might be struggling with self-love, even though you might not see the beauty within yourself, you should still consider yourself someone worthy of love, worthy of affection, and worthy of respect.
You deserve someone who thinks highly of you, someone who adores everything about you, someone who feels like they’re the lucky one in the relationship and you’re the one who is settling.
You deserve someone who makes a habit out of looking you in the eyes, calling you the most beautiful person they’ve ever seen, and convincing you it’s the truth.
You deserve someone who treats you with their full respect, even when they’re annoyed with you, even when they’ve had a rough day, even when they’re in the worst possible mood.
You deserve someone who cherishes every little thing about your looks and your personality and your soul, even the qualities you’ve always assumed were unbearable.
In order to find the kind of relationship you deserve, you need to think better of yourself. You need to realize how valuable your heart is. You need to stop looking for someone who is willing to put up with you and start searching for someone who is thrilled they’ve gotten the chance to get to know you.