Giving You A Second Chance Means Giving Myself Another Broken Heart
Giving you a second chance would mean giving you the chance to hurt me again. It would mean allowing you back into my cracked, bleeding heart. I’m not in the right place for a relationship right now — and it’s your fault. You’re the one who bruised me. You’re the one who made me realize time to myself is exactly what I need right now.
Giving you a second chance would mean placing myself back in the same exact situation and expecting different results. I’m not stupid enough to believe what happened between us has inspired you to make a change. You’re the same exact person right now as you were when you hurt me the first time. If I decide to walk back into your life, you aren’t going to treat me any better. You’re going to repeat your behavior. “Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.” I’m not about to make the same mistake a second time.
Giving you a second chance would mean disrespecting myself — and I have too much self-love for that to happen. I’ve raised my standards since the last time you’ve seen me. I’ve realized what true love really means, what genuine respect really entails. I’m not going to put myself through the pain of loving you. I care too much about myself to start caring about you again.
Giving you a second chance would mean forgiving you — and I’m not ready to forgive you. What you did was unacceptable. I’m not about to reassure you everything is okay when that isn’t the case. You haven’t even given me a proper apology yet. You haven’t realized the weight of what you put me through. It doesn’t seem right for you to get off consequence-free while I’m still suffering. It doesn’t seem fair.
Giving you a second chance would mean making an embarrassment of myself. My friends wouldn’t understand why someone as seemingly strong as me would take back someone as toxic as you. They would start looking at me differently. I would start looking at myself differently. I don’t want to be the girl who keeps going back to the boy who doesn’t deserve her. I want to set a good example. I want to remind others, and myself, to stay confident. I’m not going to settle for less than I deserve even if that means turning away love. After all, there’s better love out there.
Giving you a second chance would mean getting screwed over again. I would love to believe things are going to be different a second time around but that’s not realistic. I know what’s going to happen if you walk back into my world. You’re going to crush me as violently as the last time. You’re going to make me feel like a fool for trusting you. So I’m not going to trust you. I’m not going to give you a second chance.
If you’re upset about that, you probably shouldn’t have messed up the first time. 
