Date someone you’re confident will stay, someone who you trust isn’t going anywhere. You don’t want to commit to someone who sets off your paranoia.
You don’t want to commit to someone who thinks about running off every single time a problem pops up in your relationship. You don’t want to commit to someone who establishes ultimatums about how you need to act in order for them to stick around for a little longer. You don’t want to commit to someone who you’re worried will stray, hook up with an ex, or leave you for another girl. You don’t want to commit to someone who makes you feel like they might leave at any second.
Date someone you trust will stay — because if you’re always worried they’re going to leave you, you’re going to be uneasy around them. You’re going to censor yourself. You’re going to be extra careful about each move you make.
You don’t want to avoid bringing up an important problem in your relationship because you’re worried the smallest bit of drama is going to scare them away.
You don’t want to hold yourself back from being honest with them because you feel like you have to tiptoe around them in order to keep them interested.
You don’t want to keep your thoughts to yourself because you’re worried about them turning around and deciding to break up with you.
If you’re scared to communicate with your person, then you’re going to end up losing your person. You need to be open with each other. You need to be real with each other. You need to trust each other.
If you want a strong, stable relationship, then you should date someone who makes you feel safe and comfortable discussing problems, big and small. You should date someone who encourages you to share your issues, your complaints, and your fears. You should date someone mature enough to listen to your opinion and come to compromises with you.
You shouldn’t be walking on eggshells around the person you love the most. You shouldn’t have to watch what you say. You shouldn’t feel like you have to play pretend in order to keep them in your world.
The right person will stay, even on your toughest days. They aren’t going to leave out of the blue. They aren’t going to punish you for speaking your mind.
Sure, you’ll still get into arguments with your forever person, because no relationship is perfect. But in the middle of those arguments, you won’t be wondering whether they’re going to leave you. You’ll trust they’re going to stay and work through the issue with you. You’ll trust they’re going to put as much effort into the relationship as you do.
If you want to a happy relationship, date someone who loves you enough to stay, even when there are problems that need fixing, even when your relationship isn’t at a high point. Date someone who you’re confident will always have your back because they would never dream of letting you down.