When You're Not Pulling Your Weight In A Relationship

When You’re Not Pulling Your Weight In A Relationship

Everyone struggles. Everyone has off days. There are going to be times when you feel like you aren’t pulling your weight in a relationship — but it will be okay because your person is going to help you.

They know you can’t be on your best behavior all the time. They know you can’t do fifty things at once. If you have been going through a rough time, then your person is going to help you get through your pain. They are going to pick up some extra chores. They are going to carry some of your weight. They are going to make sure you are okay because that is the most important thing at the end of each day.

When you’re not pulling your weight in a relationship, you have to take a little bit of time to focus on yourself. You have to figure out what is causing you so much distress and work on fixing it. You have to make sure you’re in a healthy state of mind, because otherwise, your relationship will end up crumbling around you.

Of course, you can’t allow your person to hold your extra weight forever. You can’t expect them to take care of ninety-nine percent of the relationship throughout the entire relationship. You can’t get lazy. You can’t become a slacker. You can’t assume they will do everything for you while you sit around moping. You can’t allow them to consistently be the one who cares more, who puts in more effort, who makes the most sacrifices.

You can’t get used to your person swooping in when something is wrong and playing the hero. You can’t rely on them to handle all of your problems for you. You can’t forget you are supposed to be a team. They aren’t supposed to be carrying you. You are supposed to be carrying each other. You are supposed to be there for each other.

When you’re not pulling your weight in a relationship, it’s okay, as long as it’s temporary. As long as you are willing to carry some extra weight when you swap roles with your person and they are going through a rough time. As long as you are willing to do as much for them as they have been doing for you.

When you’re in a strong, healthy relationship, it’s impossible to have a good day every single day. That’s why your responsibilities aren’t always going to be split evenly. Your roles aren’t always going to be equally balanced.

When one person puts in a little extra work, the other person should make it up to them in the future. The scales shouldn’t be tipped to the same side all the time. You should be rising to help them when they aren’t in the mental state to help themselves — but they should be doing the same exact thing for you.

You might not be putting in the same amount of effort every single day, but in the end, it should add up to be about the same. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

About the author

Holly Riordan

Holly is the author of Severe(d): A Creepy Poetry Collection.