If Having Standards Makes Me Picky, I Guess I'm Picky

If Having Standards Makes Me Picky, I Guess I’m Picky

I would rather have sky high standards than settle for even a little less than I deserve.

I would rather be overly picky about who enters my world than completely indifferent.

I would rather stay single for a decade or two longer than the ‘average’ than jump into a relationship with someone who isn’t right for me.

I’m not going to apologize for having standards — especially when I’m not holding out for anything crazy. I consider my requests reasonable. If you don’t think they’re reasonable, then you’re not the one for me. You can find someone else who is more accommodating.

When it comes down to it, I’m not asking for much. I don’t want someone who is going to rise to meet my standards. I want someone who naturally meets my standards.

What I mean is, I don’t want someone who thinks staying faithful is a chore. I don’t want someone who reluctantly agrees to take me grocery shopping. I don’t want someone who has to learn how to hold themselves back from cursing me out or taking a swing at me when I get on their nerves.

I want someone who is serious about committing to me. I want someone who is excited to spend weekends together, even when we’re doing something as mundane as shopping. I want someone who would never dream of hurting me, physically or emotionally.

I understand love isn’t going to be effortless for everyone. I’m happy to date someone who needs to put a little more work into being a good partner — as long as they show potential. As long as they are actively trying to move passed their past. As long as they make it clear they aren’t going to allow their fears to get in the way of their feelings for me.

I’m not going to date a repeat cheater. I’m not going to date a known liar. I’m not going to date someone who thinks they can skate through the relationship without planning dates or picking up flowers (or at least a coffee) from time to time. I’m not going to date the wrong person just so I can stop calling myself single.

I want someone who looks me in the eyes and answers texts and cuddles after sex — but my standards are even higher than that. I’m not looking for the minimum amount of effort. I’m looking for someone who treats me right without being told. I’m looking for someone who surprises me with a bottle of wine and a weekend getaway, without me hinting about how badly I want those things. I want someone who goes out of their way to make me smile because it makes them smile.

I don’t care if I sound like a princess, like a spoiled brat, like a greedy bitch. If having any standards at all makes me picky, I guess I’m picky — but I’m sure my forever person will be able to deal with that. I’m sure my forever person will go above and beyond my expectations because they believe I deserve the best. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

Holly is the author of Severe(d): A Creepy Poetry Collection.

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