Mixed signals mean you are not interested in a serious relationship with me. Mixed signals mean you like me a little bit but not enough to put your heart on the line. Mixed signals mean I should stop wasting my time on you.
At least that is what I have always told myself — but your mixed signals are more complicated than that. Your mixed signals make zero sense.
In the past, boys who sent mixed signals would give me breadcrumbs of affection in order to keep me interested. They would compliment me, set occasional plans with me, and like all of my social media photos — but that’s about it. They would never put in a sizable amount of effort. They would never ask deep questions or pay close attention to my schedule or send me cute messages in the morning. They would only put in the minimum amount in order to keep me holding onto the idea of dating them. They would only offer me a little at a time.
That is not what you have been doing.
Yes, there are days when you act like an asshole. Days when you disappear. Days when you completely ignore my existence. But on the days when you are actually present, you give me every ounce of your attention. You treat me like I matter.
When you flirt with me, it doesn’t feel like you are leading me on. It doesn’t feel like you are trying to get something out of me. It feels real. It feels like you actually care, like you actually want me around.
Normally, I would walk away from any guy who sends mixed signals. I would say if you cannot be consistent, then you are not worth my commitment. But things with you are different. I’m not sure how to handle this situation because I’m not sure what you want from me. I’m not sure why you flirt with me the way you do. I’m not sure whether I want to walk away yet.
For some reason, I want to give you a little more time, but I’m not sure if that’s a good idea.
Maybe I am only fooling myself into believing you are different because I want it to be the case. Maybe you are the same as the rest of the boys who have stolen my heart and refused to exchange it for your own.
In the end, I know I will be okay without you. If you are not interested in a relationship with me, that is completely fine. I just want an answer. I don’t want to continue guessing how you feel. I don’t want to reread your texts for subtext. I don’t want to decode every smile you send my way.
If you like me, let me know so we can create something special together. And if you don’t, stop messing with my heart. Stop making me think there is a chance we could end up together. Stop putting ideas in my head.