Most of the time, getting back with your ex is a horrible idea. But sometimes, you two belong together.
Count up how many of these statements apply to your ex-boyfriend and check the bottom to see what the score means for the future of your relationship.
1. He has admitted he wants a relationship with you. Not a one-night stand. Not a three-month fling. An actual, committed relationship.
2. He has matured since you broke up.
3. Whatever caused the breakup would not be an issue if you tried to date again — either because your personalities have changed, your situations have changed, or your needs have changed.
4. You are able to forgive him for everything in the past. You aren’t going to bring up ancient mistakes he made every time you have an argument. You have moved passed what happened and accept it.
5. You have a strong friendship.
6. You have sat down with each other, discussed the future, and agreed about where you see yourselves in a few years.
7. Your heart is not the only piece that believes dating him again is a good idea. Your head and your gut also believe it is the right thing to do.
8. The sex is not the number one reason why you want him back.
9. He is not pressuring you into making a decision. He is willing to wait a little while for you to figure out whether getting back together with him is a good idea. He respects your decision and wants you to make the right one.
10. You feel comfortable asking him questions about where you went wrong the first time, how many girls he has been with since the breakup, and what expectations he has moving forward.
11. You know he is not perfect — but you are willing to live with his flaws. You are not going to try to change him.
12. He is actually making an effort to win you back. He did not send a random u up text in order to get back in your life. He has been treating you like a lady because he knows you deserve more than his minimum effort.
13. You do not think you’ll regret getting back together with him. But you know you will regret it if you let him walk away.
14. He admits to the mistakes he made in the past. He is no longer trying to deny them or justify them. He has been completely honest with you about his shortcomings.
15. He emphasizes the point he just wants you to be happy. Even if that means you do not pick him. Even if you walk away from him forever.
16. He brings out the best side of you. And you bring out the best side of him. You are better people when you are together.
17. Your friends miss him. Your family misses him. Everybody thought you two were perfect together.
18. You can picture a future with him. You can imagine marrying him and raising children with him (if that’s what you both want). Most importantly, you can imagine being happy with him.
19. When he apologizes, you believe him. When he promises not to hurt you again, you believe him.
20. You have never loved anyone else as much as you love him. And he feels the same way about you.
How many statements related to your relationship?
You two broke up for a reason. A good reason. You do not belong together. You might have lingering feelings for each other, but that is normal after any relationship ends. Missing each other is not a sign you should get back together. Keep your distance. Date new people. One day, you will find someone who fits you better than your ex ever did.
Do not rush into a decision. Do not jump back into a relationship with him right away. Really think about what you would be getting yourself into before you give him an answer. Ask yourself whether you miss him or only the idea of him. Ask yourself whether he is good for you or whether you are falling back into the same destructive patterns. It might seem like he’s changed, but he could be putting on an act. He could be treating you well right now to earn you back, but will revert to the old him once your relationship is a few weeks in. You’re the only one who can tell. You know him better than anyone.
You both love each other. You both miss each other. You were both at your happiest together. Even though the relationship did not work out the first time, you might live happily ever after the second time. As long as you are both willing to put effort into your love, every single day, you should try again. You should resurrect your relationship. He is worth it.