When You Matter To Me, I’ll Give You More Chances Than You Deserve

Girl giving out more chances
Unsplash / Jonathan Daniels

I will let you ignore my texts. I will let you cancel plans. I will let you flirt with other people in front of me. I will let you treat me like shit and I will still come running back.

I will give you a million chances, even if you don’t deserve them. Even if I would be better off walking away from you. Even if you’re hurting me more than you’re uplifting me.

No matter how poorly you treat me, I will stick around. It’s not out of the goodness of my heart. It’s not because I believe in second chances. It’s because I don’t want you to leave. I want you to stay. I want you in my world for years to come.

When I want something, I don’t stop until I get it — or until I am 100% certain that there is no chance in hell I’m going to get it.

The worst thing you could ever do to me is send mixed signals, because as long as I think there is a glimmer of hope for us, then I’m not going anywhere. I cling on tightly. I refuse to admit defeat.

I will keep texting you until you ignore me three or four times in a row. Until you make it abundantly clear that you want nothing to do with me, that you have no desire to speak with me and wish I would go away.

I will keep flirting with you until I embarrass myself. Until you explicitly tell me nothing is ever going to happen between us. Until I can see the situation clearly and feel like a complete idiot for chasing after you for so long.

I wear my heart on my sleeve, even though I risk making a fool of myself, because I worry too much about the what ifs. What if you feel the same way but are afraid to admit it? What if you secretly like me as much as I like you? What if I miss out on the greatest relationship of my life by letting you leave? What if, what if, what if. 

I don’t want to do too little and lose you. I would rather try too hard and look too clingy.

I get attached easily because it’s rare for me to get along with other people. Usually, I have nothing to say. Usually, I fake laughs and smiles until I’m alone again and can breathe.

I’m not used to finding someone who I’m comfortable around, so if I actually connect with you on a deeper level, I don’t want you to leave. I want to preserve our relationship. I want to do everything possible to keep you in my life.

I don’t give up on people easily because I only let others into my life when I feel like they are worth it — and when they prove to me they are not, I have a hard time dealing with it. I have a difficult time letting go. TC mark

The truth is that you can be struggling and still be loved.

You don’t have to solve your whole life tonight. You just have to show up and try. Focus on the most immediate thing in front of you. You’ll figure out the rest along the way.

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