They Are Gone, They Are Never Coming Back, And You Are Never Getting Closure

Person who needs closure
Unsplash / Matthew Henry

You still aren’t over them because there is a part of you that believes that they will come back, that your love story hasn’t ended yet. But that is a dangerous way to think.

If you want to move on, you have to stop hoping. Hoping that they will realize they made the biggest mistake of their life by leaving you. Hoping that they will explain why they did what they did to you. Hoping that they will come crawling back to you so you can start all over again.

You have to swap out that senseless hope for acceptance. Accept that you loved them, but they left you anyway. Accept that you gave them everything you had, but they never appreciated you. They never valued you. They took you for granted. They led you on. They broke your heart.

Yes, you deserve an apology. Yes, you deserve closure. But that doesn’t mean you are going to get those things.

They are gone now. They are never coming back. They aren’t going to show up on your front stoop with a mouthful of apologies, ready to answer any questions that have been keeping you up at night.

So stop thinking about what would happen if you ran into them again. Stop thinking about what you would say if they texted you out of the blue. Stop thinking about what would happen if you had a second chance with them.

The truth is that they don’t deserve a second chance. They don’t deserve to hold your heart in their hands again. They don’t deserve everything that you are.

They already had their chance and they blew it. They screwed themselves. They didn’t realize how good they had it and now they are paying the price. They are going to have to learn to live without you the same way you’ve learned to live without them.

Even if they come back one day soon, begging you to forgive them, that doesn’t mean you should comply. Even though you want them, that doesn’t mean that you are meant to be with them.

Raise your standards higher than they used to be back when you were together. From here on out, refuse to accept the kind of treatment they gave you. Never settle for someone who fails to see what a catch you are.

Promise yourself that you will stop waiting for the day that they come back and enjoy the moment instead. Promise yourself that you will stop replaying memories in your head, torturing yourself with the past. Promise yourself that you will stay single until you find someone who treats you with the love and respect that you have always deserved.

It’s hard to admit that someone you care about is out of your life forever, that the relationship meant much more to you than it ever did to them, but you have to accept that they are gone. They are never coming back. And even if they try to return, that doesn’t mean you should let them. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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