You Are Making Love More Complicated Than It’s Meant To Be

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Love isn’t supposed to be this complicated. Modern dating makes it look harder than it’s meant to be.

You’re not supposed to screenshot your conversations to show your friends, because you can’t figure out what the hell he meant and need other people to help decode his words.

You’re not supposed to overanalyze every look that he gives you, because you have absolutely no idea how he feels about you and you would both rather drop subtle hints than actually walk up to each other and talk about your feelings.

You’re not supposed to glance over at your phone every two seconds for two days straight, because you’re still waiting for a response from him that he should have sent ages ago.

You’re not supposed to experience a high when he actually pays attention to you and then crash when he decides to act like you don’t exist.

You’re not supposed to cry your eyes out on your bedroom floor, because you’re pretty sure that you just ruined your chances with him and that he’s never going to feel the same way.

Once you become an official couple, yes, there will be difficult days. Days where you have to fight to stay strong together. Days filled with struggle.

But the getting-together part isn’t supposed to be this complicated. It’s supposed to be the easy part.

You’re supposed to lock eyes from across the room and smile, because you know they’re about to walk over to spark a conversation.

You’re supposed to have flirty conversations tinged with sexual tension.

You’re supposed to feel your heart jump when you read their text and be confident that they feel the same way when you reply.

You’re supposed to feel butterflies and have shaky hands because you can tell that they like you as much as you like them.

You’re supposed to look forward to seeing them, not be worried because you have no idea if they’re going to treat you kindly that day or make you feel like complete shit.

If getting together is overly complicated, then the relationship will be overly complicated.

So say no to mixed signals. To people who play hard to get. To people who act like they couldn’t care less about you.

If you have no idea what’s running through their mind, then maybe you don’t belong together.

If it’s taking you two forever to turn your friendship into something more, then maybe you don’t belong together.

If this person is driving you crazy (and not in a good way), then maybe you don’t belong together.

Love isn’t supposed to be this complicated. You’re supposed to find someone you’re attracted to, someone you enjoy spending time with, and then flirt with them for a while. Let them know how you feel. And make your relationship official. It really can be that easy.

If liking someone brings you more pain than happiness, if it causes additional stress in your already drama-filled life, then maybe you have been chasing after the wrong person.

Maybe you should say goodbye to this person who makes you despise modern dating and wait for the person who makes this whole dating thing feel like a piece of cake. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

Holly Riordan is the author of Lifeless Souls, available here.

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