This Is Why You Think Your Ex Is Over You — Even Though They Aren’t Yet

God & Man

You think your ex is over you, because they keep posting pictures of themselves partying and going out on spontaneous adventures. They’re doing it to make you jealous. They’re doing it to prove that they have a life outside of you. They’re doing it to keep themselves busy, because if they sit still for too long, they’ll think about you and all of the ways that they miss you.

You think your ex is over you, because they changed their relationship status and deleted all of the pictures you snapped together. Because you noticed that they took your memories down from Facebook and assumed that they deleted them from their computer, as well. Because they’re making it look like they’re over you, like they never even cared about you in the first place.

You think your ex is over you, because they haven’t contacted you. Your phone hasn’t beeped. Your doorbell hasn’t rang. They’ve been keeping their distance instead of saying the words that keep floating through their thoughts. They’re keeping all of their emotions stuffed inside, because they think it’s better for them. That it’s better for you. That it’ll help you both move on faster.

You think your ex is over you, because they act casual whenever they see you in public. They don’t show any signs of missing you. They don’t seem like they’re affected by the break up at all. They talk to you like you’re just a friend, or even worse, like you’re just another stranger.

But that’s only because you see them when they’re forcing themselves to act cool — not when they drive home and smash the steering wheel, not when they cry inside of their driveway, not when they get home and text all their friends about how they ran into you and hate you because you looked fucking perfect.

You assume your ex is over you before they actually move on from you, because we’re all so good at playing pretend. We don’t want to admit that we’re the ones who care more. We don’t want to to reach out and risk rejection. We don’t want to ‘lose’ the breakup.

So we go out on dates before we’re ready. We find rebounds. We polish our social media to make it look like we’re happier now than we ever were in our relationship. We put in all our effort to make it look like we’re over the same people we dream about every night.

We think our pain will be easier to deal with if no one else knows about it. If we suffer in silence, but are all smiles when we’re out in public.

So we call ourselves single, even though we feel like the relationship isn’t over yet. We act like we’re ready for the next person when we’re still stuck on the last one.

You always think your ex is over you sooner than they actually are, because they want it that way. They want you to think that you never even cross their mind. They want you to think that you’re the only one still hung up on the breakup.

Because admitting that they care is just too painful. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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