The Real Reason Why He Hasn’t Been Texting You

Unsplash, Steinar La Engeland
Unsplash, Steinar La Engeland

No matter how packed his schedule is, there’s always a little wiggle room. If he has the time for a bathroom break or a snack break, then he has the time to shoot you a two-second text. So, the reason he’s been radio silent isn’t because he’s been busy. It isn’t because he needs to focus on his work. It isn’t because he’s a bad texter.

But it isn’t because you’re unattractive or annoying, either. It isn’t because you texted him too many times in a row or initiated the conversation every single time. It isn’t because you seemed too clingy or too desperate. It isn’t because you were being you.

In fact, it has nothing to do with your personality. It has to do with his. He’s not ready for a woman like you to become a permanent part of his life. He’s not ready to dedicate chunks of his time to texting you, let alone taking you out on dates and spending the night.

Do you actually want a guy who can’t press a few buttons on his phone just to put a smile on your face? If he isn’t willing to text you, do you really think he’s going to put in the effort to buy you flowers or find the perfect date spot? No way. Those things won’t even cross his mind.

So don’t clutter up your mind with internal debates, trying to figure out what the appropriate amount of time is to wait before you text him again. The answer is simple: Don’t text him. Don’t do it.

And stop staring at your phone, waiting for his name (and the heart emojis that go with it) to pop up. If he’s not texting you, he’s not thinking about you. And if he’s not thinking about you, then he’s not interested in dating you. Not seriously, anyway.

Even if he is texting you, occasionally isn’t enough. Messaging you at two in the morning to see if you’re still awake is a clear indication that he’s only looking for sex. Either that or he’s completely wasted. But it doesn’t really matter whether he’s drunk or horny, because you don’t need a guy who waits until the dead of night to contact you.

You need a guy who thinks of you when he wakes up in the morning, when he’s out with his friends, when he smells a certain perfume. If beer is the only thing that brings you to the front of his mind, he’s clearly not the one for you.

If he rarely texts you, and if the texts he does send feel fake and forced, then there’s no reason for you to make plans to see him in person. If you can’t hold a conversation over the phone, where it’s easier to relax and think through what you’re going to say, then you’ll probably clash in person.

Wait until you find someone you have chemistry with, over the phone and face-to-face. Even better, someone who makes an effort over the phone and face-to-face. TC mark

The truth is that you can be struggling and still be loved.

You don’t have to solve your whole life tonight. You just have to show up and try. Focus on the most immediate thing in front of you. You’ll figure out the rest along the way.

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