You can’t imagine anyone getting butterflies when your name pops up on their phone. You can’t imagine anyone daydreaming about you when they get bored at work. You can’t imagine anyone ever falling for you, because it’s never happened before. Of course, that doesn’t mean it won’t happen in the future, which is why this is something you need to read.

You only have one soulmate.

Or maybe you have a few soulmates, but either way, the amount of people you’ll clash with will outnumber the amount of people you’ll connect with. So don’t stress out if all of your crushes have turned out to be dead-ends. When someone screws you over, don’t think of it as a reason to stay inside and eat ice cream. Think of it as an opportunity to jump back into the dating pool and find the person who’s truly meant for you. Some people waste their entire lives with the wrong partner, so be thankful you still have time to spare.

You’re not your insecurities.

You might hate how flabby your stomach is, how big your nose is, or how over-analytical your brain is. But guess what? When you meet the right person, they aren’t going to focus on your “flaws.” That doesn’t mean they’ll be blind, that they’ll see you as some perfect creature who can do no wrong. They’ll still notice your weak points, but they won’t give a damn about them. That means they won’t try to fix you, because they’ll already be happy with who you are–and who are you? You’re the love of their life.

You’re a total catch.

It’s easy to believe that “anyone would be lucky to have you” is a lie, especially when it’s coming from friends and family who are pretty much required to make you feel better about yourself. But whether you believe the line or not, it’s the truth. You’re the type of person who would buy your partner soup and sing them silly little lullabies when they’re sick. You’re the type of person who would sit side-by-side with them on the couch, reading a book while they watched their favorite TV show. Doesn’t that make you a catch?

You never know what others are thinking.

Haven’t you had crushes that you’ve kept to yourself? Of course you have. Well, then isn’t it possible that there are a few people out there who are crushing on you, but would never admit it? Don’t assume that you’re unlovable, just because you haven’t received any love letters or dick pics. More people like you than you think.

Pessimism won’t get you anywhere. 

If you tell yourself that you’re never going to find love, you’re setting yourself up for failure. Even if a sexy stranger flirts with you, you won’t read anything into it, because you’ll assume that they aren’t actually interested. So if you want someone to fall for you, you have to realize that you’re worth falling for. That’s why you always hear that you “have to learn to love yourself before you can love somebody else.” Your confidence can take you a long way.