28. You’re Obviously Miscarrying
“My friend called a nurse hotline because she was having horrible, horrible menstrual cramps.
‘You must be having a miscarriage,’ they said.
‘I really don’t think so.’ she replied.
‘Are you sexually active?’ they asked.
‘Yes, yes I am.’ she said.
‘Well, then you are obviously having a miscarriage.’ they insisted.
‘I’m a lesbian.’ replied my friend.
‘Oh. Well. Would you like to speak to one of our LGBT staff?'”
29. Outlook Favorable
“I gave a new gyno one of her favorite responses to ‘Currently sexually active?’ I had recently started seeing someone so we weren’t quite there yet so I said ‘Outlook favorable.'”
30. She Was Very Religious
“Not a nurse but I work in a hospital and this story was too great to pass up telling. so I watch cardiac monitors for a living. we had this 18-21 yr old female don’t remember exactly age. But she was in for asthma problems and we also watch O2. So apparently this girl was from a very religious family and told the nurses and doctors that no she was not sexually active and never has been. She was going to a local college and was brought in by someone who we were told was her ‘cousin’.
She gets admitted. About 230 in the morning her heart rate goes up to like the 150s- 160s and her O2 us at like 85% (that’s really bad for a anyone when they are supposed to be asleep and at rest). So I get up and run to go check on the patient turns out her cousin stayed the night. So here I come bursting into this room with like two nurses while this girl is like eyeballs deep on her ‘cousin’s’ penis and when the door bursts open and the lights go on he got startled jumped forward and causes her to immediately vomit all over him. I turn to the nurses and say ‘well at least it wasn’t a cardiac event’ and leave so I could fall to the floor laughing. And I believe the she checked out soon after that.”