49. Rough TP
“Guy comes into the ED complaining of rectal bleeding. Pretty standard. I get blood from him and assist the doc as he performs a rectal exam. Doc doesn’t notice any hemorrhoids but notes some light tearing typical with a patient wiping too hard. Tells the patient to chill out on the TP. Patient responds, ‘Yea, my TP is pretty rough.’
A few hours later the patient has a male visitor. I introduce myself and ask who the visitor is and how he knows the patient. Patient looks at me and says, ‘This is the TP I was telling you about earlier.’
Took me a minute to understand what he was saying, then had to excuse myself from the room as I could no longer remain professional.”
ChaplnGrillSgt
50. Old People Are The Sauciest
“Nursing student here. My new all time favorite happened earlier today when I asked a new 92 year old man the dreaded question.
‘So sir, as these questions are generic to each patient I have to ask: Do you have any worries about your sexuality?’
To which he replied: ‘Yeah, I don’t get enough of the sex part.’
The look on his wife’s face was priceless.”
Sexytimeswithbae