46. The Love Board

“I had a very large woman that had a slivers of wood in her skin that were starting to get infected and when asked about the slivers, she replied ‘That is from my love board.’

‘What is a love board?’ I asked…

‘That is the board that my husband uses to push up my fat so that we can have sex.’

…..yorf.”
ihearttatertots

47. The Two Bottle Rule

“Obligatory “not me but” (I was in the room). GF goes in for intestinal pain. Very patient middle-aged Doc asks standard questions:

‘Sexually active?’ – GF: Yep ‘Frequently’ – GF: Yep ‘ok…Anal sex?’ GF: ‘After two bottles of wine Doc anything goes.’

Laughs ensue. If he was white I’d say the doctor was blushing.”
VAJAYNUS

48. Doc Disapproves

“Worst joke I ever made during a physical exam for football:

Doctor: ‘What’s your sexual history?’
Me: ‘Mostly 5’s and 6’s. I had a 7 once.’

He did not laugh. He just looked at me with a frown.”
StarbuckPirate