39. Just Really Gross
“I was working at a public urgent care clinic in a lower income area and had a guy tell me he had a vacation in the Philippines that was basically a gay sex vacation with prostitutes.
His main issue was that since then he had experienced a ‘tickling’ sensation over his butt hole and I sort of dismissed the guy as crazy in my head just by his mannerisms and dress.
Sure enough, he said that he read it could be pinworm which can be diagnosed by placing a piece of scotch tape on the anus and seeing what sticks to it.
Guess what happened next? He pulled the tape out of his pocket and there were dead worms, pubes and ‘stuff’ on it. That was a horrible but memorable patient encounter.”
40. The Next Thing You Know…
“There was this husband and wife combo in the exam room for an STD complaint. Taking the history from the husband I had to ask how he contracted the possible disease. He goes, ‘It was the funniest thing. I was getting a massage then the next thing you know this guy is fucking me in the ass.’ The wife left the room she was so angry, I took my note and left.”
41. The Cocaine May Have Still Been In His System
“Emergency nurse here. Most favorite happened only a few weeks ago. A very good looking clean man in a suit came in with a 10inch dildo up his butt. Like very high up his rectum. It was one of those dildos with a ball sack attached and this guy has the whole thing even the balls up there….. It seems him and his girlfriend took a shit ton of cocaine then decided to ‘play’. I had to ask him why it seemed like a good idea to put it there and his response was “it was like everest the attempt had to be made for the good of man kind”. The cocaine might still have been in his system. Anyway I learnt lots of this that day such as silicone can be seen on x-ray and the inside of the rectum is negative pressure. The doctor could get his hand up there but the pressure he couldn’t actually pull it out….. Few enemas and pushing later it was far enough down that the doctor could help this man give his to a bright neon blue ‘baby.'”