32 Ironic And Darkly Funny Family Deaths That You’ll Hate Yourself For Laughing About

These deaths will have you in stitches.

16. A Fitness Induced Heart Attack

A friend of mine was an athlete, with an amazing body, 6-pack and all of that jazz. Didn’t smoke, drank occasionally. Dropped dead in the middle of the night, in his dorm room, due to a natural heart attack. Doctors said his case was very rare, and is seen only in athletes.

In layman’s term, his heart attack was because of his fitness.

17. Hospital Mix Up

My great-aunt died when the hospital accidentally removed her good kidney, instead of her bad one.

I was just a kid when it happened, so I didn’t find out all the details for a long time. Now that I know, though, I’m kind of upset. You never heard the expression, “Measure twice, cut once”, Mr. Surgeon?

18. “The Man Just Won’t Die”

I’ll put my husband in here.

I had a joke for a long time “The man just WON’T DIE” Thankfully, I was no where near him when he eventually did pass away.

First, he was 18 years older than me, so there were many, many times that I don’t even know about. These are just things I know about in the 20 or so years that I knew him.

  • Got into many motorcycle accidents. One that I knew about was a woman pulled out to cross his lane of travel. He saw it coming, so he sorta stood up and did a roll over the top of her car. Barely a scratch on him. Bike was a mess though.
  • While driving through a forested swampy area, he nodded off. Went off the road and managed to miss EVERY SINGLE TREE. Came to rest gently against a boulder. Cops couldn’t figure it out. He wasn’t injured at all and the car was fine.
  • He developed a lung ulcer from smoking dope crack or something like that. I had left him at this point to care for our toddler daughter, and I didn’t want to watch himself kill himself. He went to the hospital eventually. They gave him penicillin. Turns out he was allergic to penicillin. Doctors gave him a small chance of survival. So he called me and asked me to take him home to die. When I picked him up, his feet were literally the size of watermelons due to the allergic reaction. I bought him cigarettes on the way to his house. Yup, he survived.
  • A while later he was welding in something like an elevator shaft. A huge piece of metal dropped down and hit him square on the head. It flung him out of the shaft and against a wall. He was knocked out, but eventually regained consciousness. He tried to go back to work, but his boss sent him home. He went back to work the next day. About a month later, the pain in his neck got to be annoying, so he went and got X-Rays. 3 vertebrae were shattered and he lost 3 inches of height. Walked around for a month with a broken back.
  • At least once, almost overdosed on heroin. Said the thought of our daughter brought him out of it.

How he actually did die is the ironic part. He was on Methadone for the addiction problems and pain issues. He was fighting with his doctor about the dosage. He thought that the dosage was too high, from what I understand. He had a close call about a week before he did die.

He got his dose. Took the bus to my grandmother’s house (he did work around her house for her) Said he didn’t feel well. She let him lay down on her couch. That’s where he died….just went to sleep.

Another odd thing too. I wasn’t aware that Baptists go door to door. He was a Baptist. At the moment my grandmother found him, Baptists came to her door. She was freaking out, of course. One of them was an EMT, so they attempted to revive him.

All of this was 3 days before our daughter’s 12th birthday. I had taken the day out of work to prepare for her birthday. I’m a workaholic…so he was very considerate to wait until I had a day off?

He was a pain in the ass, but I miss the motherfucker.


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