41 Guys Share The Secrets They Desperately Want Women To Know

via lookcatalog - Milly Cope
via lookcatalogMilly Cope


“It’s the little things you say off the cuff that I really remember.”


“I’m not mad means I’M NOT MAD!”


“I don’t have a clue. Seriously not a single one. If you want me to know something you better just tell me because I’m not gunna get it otherwise.”


“When we sit near you quietly, it doesn’t mean something is wrong!

Guys are happy just sitting and being next to you. We don’t always need to be talking or doing anything to be content.”


“I know when you look in the mirror, all you see are flaws. What you hate, what you despise. What you wish you had, what you dreamed you had. But all I see is the girl who makes me laugh. The girl who makes me smile. The girl who’s clever. The girl who’s witty. The girl who never gives up. But most of all I see the girl who makes me feel like I’ve won the jackpot every day. And I know, no matter how many times you look in the mirror, you’ll probably never see any of these amazing things, but I needed you to know that it’s what I see every time I look at you.”


“Sometimes we just need that down time during the week. Maybe for an hour or so after we get home, we just need to relax.

I just spent 14 hours working my ass off. It’s not that I love you any less, I just don’t want to poison you with the stress I gained from that day.

I’ll tell you about the day if you ask, but please don’t get on me as soon as I get home. Give me those few minutes to myself to clean up, get comfortable, and drink something cool.”


“We won’t always make the first move.”


“Enthusiasm with a blow job goes a lot further than some technique you read in some magazine.”


“I’m not an emotionless dude. I think about you all the time. Sometimes the smallest things remind me of you. I’m not always great at expressing it, and sometimes I am confused by my own thoughts and emotions. But believe me, you’re on my mind.”


“It is almost impossible for me to say ‘I love you.’ It baffles me that my countless actions don’t convince her I love her. I don’t get it at all. Words are pretty meaningless, my actions cannot be faked or be a lie. Much more meaningful to me.”


“Don’t run away during/after an argument and expect a guy to run after you and try to ‘get you back. Leaving means you need your space to cool down, and that’s perfectly reasonable.

It’s surprising how many girls, even after the high school relationship bullshit phase, still pull this and then get so mad that you don’t care about them because you didn’t go running after. You wanna leave? Leave. I don’t have time to play games with you.”


“When I want to be alone, it has nothing to do with you. I’m just excessively gassy at times.”


“When I’m sleeping with you. Hold me like a teddy bear.”


“When we tell you something in confidence, it’s not ok to tell your best friend. Really. It’s not.”


“Men fall in love. And it hurts when it’s over. We’ll do our best to keep looking alright, but we can be crushed. To the point we never fully recover.

These words don’t do the experience justice.”


“Running your hand through my hair, scratching my head, and messing with my hair in almost any way feels fantastic for me too.”


“Just because I smile at you in passing or if we somehow make eye contact, does not mean I am being creepy and want to bang you.”


“Just because we find other women attractive, it doesn’t mean we find you any less attractive or would leave you for a stranger that passes by.”


“My failure to compliment your outfit, hair, or makeup is not malicious. It’s not because I take you for granted.

When I look at you I don’t see you as you are this second. I see you as I saw you for the first time, wearing that jean jacket with your hair pulled back. I see you as I saw you in that moment by the lake, when we realized we were going to tackle life together and everything else was just a formality. I see you as I saw you on our wedding day. I see you as I saw you on our wedding night.

When you said you appreciated that I wasn’t a superficial person, I wish you had understood the other side of that coin: I don’t care if you are wearing that new dress or sweatpants. I see everything you were, are, and will be to me. I’m going to look at you with the same quiet wonder until our time together is over.”


“I love it when you’re happy about something and you sometimes make those super cute ‘Eeek’ sounds.”


“If you’re out with a guy friend and someone asks if you’re together, don’t say ‘eewww no’ or anything like that. Even if you’re our friend, and we don’t want anything from you beyond that, shit still stings.”


“If you are interested in us, just fucking say something.”


“When we give you a fucking compliment, accept it goddamnit.”


“If a guy says, ‘whatever you want to do,’ or ‘whatever makes you happy,’ there are NO mind games going on, he actually just values your happiness over getting his own way.

Going out vs. Staying in
Pizza vs. Chinese

Etc. If we cared, we’d pick one, otherwise your happiness will make whatever we eat/do that much better.”


“Men are not just mindless sex machines. We have feelings, needs, and wants just like you, we just have different ways of expressing them.

If a man opens up to you, it’s a special thing for most of us, especially introverts. And when we do, it’s typically a large volume of emotions, which can be overwhelming. But society has told us to keep it in, so we do, I do. Every single serious issue I have had with my life I have dealt with alone, internally. It is still this way, even though I could be considered ‘popular’ by some, because they are my problems to deal with. It even took me a long time to open up to my ex of three years when we were dating, and even then I wouldn’t show how extreme the emotional toll some things took.

Society tells us to shut the fuck up, hold it in, and fuck bitches. We’re supposed to be stoic and cold and know what to do in nearly all situations. Naturally, this wears on our psyche. I’m not saying men have it harder than women, because honestly being a woman is probably leagues more fucked up. But life is in no way a cake walk for us either, and just because we act like everything is okay, just like everything else in life, if you dig deep enough, things probably aren’t. Most of us always have something to share, but only to the right person, and only at the right time.”


“We don’t spread our legs out to be ass holes. We do it so our balls are not squeezed to death by our legs.”


“Sometimes I’m really thinking about nothing.”


“You are prettier than you think you are.”


“Gay man here. Just because you just met me and never had a ‘gay best friend’ does not make us best friends. You need to buy us a drink first.”


“That time you smiled when I caught you looking at me on the subway that one Friday in April made everything shitty that happened that week at work disappear.”


“We are honestly as clueless as you are regarding how to keep another person happy, fulfilled, and in love with you.

Also, many of us really want to be the traditional provider of yesteryear but due to wage stagnation and the erosion of benefits it’s an extremely difficult prospect these days. We carry around massive guilt because we can’t measure up to our fathers and grandfathers in this.”


“If you are not romantically interested in us, please do not go out on a date with us.”


“Please do not judge us by our friends. Nearly all of our male friends were gained like in The Walking Dead. They answered our own ‘three questions’ satisfactorily enough to become part of the group.

There are some in our group of friends that we regret letting in, but men tend to let them die on the vine, versus confront them and cast them out.

Jeff, is a real shit, he never pays his share and tries to talk to Mike’s teenage daughter about dating. That is fucked up. Fuck that guy.

Jeff does not know we are not going to help him anymore when ‘walkers’ are bearing down on him. So just understand that some of the guys I know are dead to me already. They just don’t know it yet.”


“The sexiest thing you can wear is a sun dress.”


“I can recall with perfect clarity every single compliment I’ve ever been given. Men don’t get compliments like women so when we do it absolutely floors us and makes our entire month. Like the time the front desk woman at the YMCA told me that she liked my hair.”


“Most of the time, we would rather something let something eat away at our soul than talk about it. When I am zoned out and pissed off about nothing, this is why. The dog understands it.”


“We need guy time. We don’t want to go out fucking other women, we just want to get drunk and do boring guy shit. Once a month is all we need, just as long as you are not there. Don’t get moody and call/sms/email us the entire time we are out.”


“Don’t listen to Cosmopolitan! We don’t like the things that they tell you to do!”


“Saying you’re fine when you’re not is worse than telling me what’s really going on.”


“Guys bond through activities. Women bond through communication.

I have more memories about “hey remember the time we….” than times I spent talking to my best friend about out dating lives.”


“Women use the word ‘cute’ so often I have no idea what it means anymore.” Thought Catalog Logo Mark

Curious about what Women Desperately Wish Men Knew About Them? CLICK HERE

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Eric Redding

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