7 Brutally Honest Reasons Why You Never Get The Guy

7 Brutally Honest Reasons Why You Never Get The Guy

We always wonder why we’re single, why we never get to score a relationship, why we never settle long enough with someone to call them a “boyfriend.” Why, just why, right? Why if we ever we have a chance to talk to a boy, it will be over before we know it? Why if we ever find someone to ignite a fire with, he would be gone in a blink of an eye? Why leaving without a goodbye or a lame excuse onto why he stopped chatting you back, texting you back or seeing you is totally acceptable? Why if ever we meet a good individual with great topics to talk about today, will be gone the next day? Why? Just why.

1. You’re too serious.

At your age, yes, you might be too young to get married and have kids, but you’re definitely too old for flirtatious conversations that lead nowhere. You’re definitely too old for valueless talks. This time of your life, you’re serious. Serious about being with someone who can have enough balls to be there for you. You’re too serious, that’s why you don’t need a crappy “hey”, you need a sincere “how was your day?” You’re too serious, that’s why you don’t need your phone buzzing at 2 AM asking you “what’s up”, you need your phone ringing at 7 AM reminding you to have a great day and assuring you the you will overcome today. You’re too serious and that’s what you need.

2. You’re looking for too much.

You’re high-maintenance. You have demands, you have standards. You ask for this, you ask for that. And even though you do your best to give them their needs and demands, it wasn’t enough. You might be able to handle what they need, but they can’t handle yours.

You demand time. You want them to spend time with you, whether it’s just a one-minute phone call or a simple dinner. You want them to exert even the smallest amount of time just to ask you you about your day. You want time, an hour or a minute will do.

You demand interest. You want them to at least listen to you – to your stories, theories, passion. You want them to lend an ear and hear your cries. To listen to those moments when you feel like life is too cruel, those moments when you feel outmost lonely and depressed. You demand interest not attraction. At least an effort to take note of how you like your coffee, or your favorite movie, or your happiest achievement in life, or the lamest joke you have. That’s the kind of interest you want.

You demand acceptance. The kind that no matter how dark you are, your past, your mistakes, your experiences — they will still accept you with open hearts. Because they know that it’s in true acceptance that you find real love. Love that is consistent and faithful; unfailing and kind.

All of which they can’t provide.

3. You have no time for meaningless flings.

You have time for sincerity and truthfulness. You have time for conversations about life, dreams and passion. You have time for serious commitment. Meanwhile, this is what they suck at. They only want dates without strings and someone to talk to when they’re bored. They achieved a Master’s Degree on meaningless flings.

How they are may be the reason why you never get them. You don’t have the same level of commitment.

4. You’re futuristic.

They’re thinking about what happens tonight and you’re jumping about your life with them for the next six months. No, he can’t handle that. He is the kind of boy who lives in the now. You can’t expect a future with him. If you mistakenly express your desire to build a future with him, you’ll see him running in a second tops.

You never get the boy because you think about what’s going to happen in the near future, because you have plans of settling, of committing – that terrifies him, terrifies him real hard. They don’t like long-term commitment. They don’t like relationships. They’re the kind who wants freedom, who wants to explore, live – as much as they can. They want to be able to talk to you when they want to and then leave when they want to. They want the freedom to date you and the same freedom to date others.

5. Choosing you is not their priority.

They have better things to do, things they have to prioritize before you and your wishful desires. Their time is precious. They can’t afford to fit you in their priority list.

“If they want to, they’ll make time” — so, if he’s not making time, then he doesn’t want to. You don’t need to complicate things, just let them go and let them be. If they want to be with you, they’ll find a way.

6. They just don’t like you.

No explanation necessary.

7. Maybe because, simply, you don’t deserve a boy.

At the end of the day, you don’t deserve just any boy, you deserve a MAN. A man who will be constant, loyal and responsible – for you feelings and for your future. Someone who will hold your heart and know the amount of power he has. You never get the boy because in the first place, you were never meant to be with just a boy. You were never meant to chase a boy. A man will come after you, you don’t have to lower yourself and neither your standards. A real man will know your real worth. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

About the author

Dian Tinio

Dian is the author of Catastrophes, a prose and poetry collection exploring living and loving, breaking and mending, falling and rising, losing and surviving. Get in touch with her on Instagram and Twitter.