Are you starting to feel like you’re attracting the wrong type of guys (like homeless men, for example)? It might be due to the fact that you’re giving off the wrong impression when you’re out on the town. And who better to point out all the things that are making you look like the girl that wants to be taken home instead of the girl who wants to be taken out than your local bartender, who has a bird’s eye view of what male patrons look for while they’re staking out potential one night stands?
Read on for what these 10 bartenders had to say about the things you’re doing that are making you look easy – from the drinks you order to the shoes you’re sporting.
1. Playing with the stem of your cherry.
“Ladies, you are not Carrie Bradshaw and this is not SATC. If you’re ordering a Manhattan just so that you can twirl the cherry stem around your tongue while making eyes at the cute guy at the end of the bar, you’re suggesting that you’re willing to use that tongue in many other ways later on that night…” -Morgan, 24
2. Sending a guy a drink, and following it with a wink.
“As a single guy, I would love for a woman to buy me a drink at a bar. But there’s something about her using that as leverage in order to get a guy’s attention, followed by winking that instantly makes guys see her as easy.” -Brad, 32
3. The shoes you’re wearing (and how you walk in them).
“Typically, the women who are really out to get it in decide the best chance of this happening is to wear the highest, most ridiculously uncomfortable pair of heels they can find. If you can rock them, wear them, but when you’re stumbling around at the end of the night it looks pretty clear that you wore them in order to attract attention, not because you’re the kind of lady who loves to wear heels all the time.” -Chrissy, 31
4. Talking too much once a guy buys you a drink.
“I see women make this mistake all the time. If a guy buys you a drink, of course you have to acknowledge that a transaction has been made, and that you’ve made an agreement to talk to him by accepting it. But there’s an 80/20 rule that you need to employ in order not to come off too needy. Let the guy who bought you the drink talk 80 percent of the time, while you talk 20.” -Brett
5. Doing lots of shots.
“Not just engaging in one round of celebratory shots, but huddling together with your two or three other girlfriends and demanding shots from the bartender while cheering loudly and making a commotion is going to make you look like you want attention (and not the right kind of attention).” -Kyle, 22
6. Ordering for someone you just met.
“This happens all the time at the bar I work at. If a patron meets someone for the first time, and then they decide to act like they know them by ordering for them and not even asking what they want to drink, it comes off as needy and overbearing, like you need to be in control.” –Eric, 27
7. Laughing too much.
“I get it, you just met this guy at the bar and you’re nervous. But for crying out loud, not everything this guy is saying is that funny, and you cracking up at every other sentence followed by the phrase ‘I can’t even!‘ is going to make you look desperate.” -Steve, 26
8. Asking, “What are you drinking?”
“When a girl comes up to the bar, makes eye contact with a guy, then looks at his empty glass, then at her empty glass, and then asks him what he’s drinking, it’s clear that she’s looking for him to buy her a drink.” -Paul, 23
9. Sitting with your boobs sticking out.
“Girls who prop themselves up at the bar stool and make sure to stick their chest out as far as they can are definitely targets at my bar.” -Dan, 31
10. Going to the bar alone.
“Not the woman who comes in, has one drink and goes home after work. It’s the one who keeps drinking, tries to make friends with the people seated next to her and also tries to get me to buy her free rounds while I’m serving her because ‘she’s there all alone.’ It’s not a good look.” -Jared, 28