1. Make your bed
You have too many things on your plate. Paying rent, bills, meeting up with friends. Just roll out of bed and get on with your life. You can make your bed another day (at least, that’s what you tell yourself).
2. Say yes
When you’re in your 20s, the most beautiful feeling is that anything is possible. But the worst feeling, as we all know, is the fear of missing out, the ugly FOMO monster living under your (unmade) bed. The truth is that saying no will just guide you to the things you want the most. “Yes” can actually be the most limiting word in the English language.
3. Keep up with ‘friends’
You know all of those “friends” you made during college? You know, when you were in the Graduates Of 2007 Facebook group? You will (probably) never ever talk to them again. Unfriend them. Rinse and repeat. You won’t regret it, I promise.
4. Go out
Say it with me: you. Don’t. Need. Happy. Hour. Well, at least not every day. Or the kind of happy hour that turns into a sad seven-hour night of sweaty bars and street meats. The beauty of adulthood in your 20s is that you’re still young enough to be in touch with your most fun, yet totally innocent self. Get delivery. Watch movies. Do karaoke. Play laser tag, for Christ’s sake. You can do anything you want, and it doesn’t have to involve being rubbed up on by a bunch of drunk strangers.
5. Stay in
Say it with me: DALÉ. Okay, sorry. No more Pitbull. But whatever, you’re 20-something years old. You don’t have to stay home and waste your time on Netflix and Seamless. Go out. Kiss someone you love, or someone you like a little bit. You’re young, you smell good, go have unforgettably wonderful times.
6. Rely fully on your parent(s)
Even if it’s out of love, what a parent wants for you may not be the same as what you want for you. While having a strong support system is oftentimes very important, it’s up to you to decide whether what’s being supported is something you’re on board with. I mean, it’s time to depend on yourself. You have a job and a place to live, so what are you doing asking your parents for help? Do things on your own. You’ll come out better for it.
At this stage of life, it starts to seem like every asshole from high school has a piece of grilled chicken on deck, some tasteless asparagus on the grill, and 17 go-to yoga or weight lifting selfies to post on Instagram whenever they’re feeling particularly #FitFam. It’s all a fantasy and it’s not your life. Unfollow or ignore for your own mental health. You have a life to live, you don’t need to spend it navel-gazing, waiting for your abs to show.
8. Have a ton of sex
Your 20s aren’t the only time you have to get laid or fall in love. You don’t need to feel obligated to have sex with anyone. Take it slow or take it fast, but however you want to take it, make sure it’s the way you want to go, and not the way any friend or media outlet’s value system makes it feel like you should be going.
9. Be in a relationship
You don’t need to be with someone to enjoy your 20s, even when it feels like everyone around you is paired off. Don’t be the single friend who can’t be around couples. As irritating as it can be to be the third, fifth, or even the goddamned seventh wheel, know that your time will come and that it’s not your prerogative to force a relationship with someone with whom you just want to have fun and be casual.
People say there’s no better time than traveling in your 20s. They could not be so wrong. You need a foundation to leap off from and you make that NOW, not later. Don’t regret it later. Secure your dreams now so that you can reap the benefits later.
11. Buy things
Anyone can post a picture of something awesome on social media and act like a baller rich kid of Instagram, but not everyone can keep a damn savings account. Be the ‘not everyone’ now so you can be the baller ‘anyone’ later.
12. Binge watch Game Of Thrones
Just kidding. I don’t know how I’d motivate myself without Tyrion’s speeches.
13. Start a career
Some jobs are just that: jobs. They won’t all be stepping stones on your path to self-actualization, workplace utopia, and career bliss. You might work in a restaurant for three months and never work in one again in your life, but it will allow you to eliminate the options that aren’t right for you. Shitty jobs now make for good careers later.
14. Brag about how much coffee you drink
When it comes down to it, you could honestly brag about just how much tea you drink(if you really want).
Seamless is your best friend! ;o)
16. Upgrade your phone
Apple is the worst and most persistent ex who will text you at 2AM just to update you on something completely insignificant. Go home, Apple, you’re drunk.
17. Talk to that asshole
You read this and you thought of a name. Yeah, you’re old enough now that you can lose this person and have plenty of other things to be happy about. Don’t talk to that asshole.
18. Drunk singing
As we grow up / and get drunker / all the shots we had together / And as we blackout / say whatever / we will have this / hangover forever.
19. Like ‘anything’
You don’t have to click on that, like it, or share it. While you’re at it, you don’t have to say “Happy birthday” or “Congrats!” Stick to the contacts in your phone. Compliment people in person. Don’t feel like you need to constantly give out your approval.
20. Buy that extra drink
Moderation, when done right, can be the night’s biggest high.
21. Listen to other people’s opinions of selfies
You’ll have your shameless selfie savants, and you’ll have your brooding mystery men detractors. They’re probably both wrong. Take however many selfies you like. If you end up losing friends over your selfie excess, consider it a convenient exercise in friend-pruning.
22. Grow up
You can get older without growing up, and that’s not a bad thing. Learn who you are more each day. Talk to the people you love and care about their thoughts, but not about what everyone thinks of you. Be better with age, not older.
All you have to be at age 22 is yourself.