I know life has let you down.
Maybe your plans didn’t go as you had hoped they would. Maybe the person you trust the very most has let you down. Maybe you received a letter politely telling you that you didn’t get the job, but “thank you for applying.” Maybe you are trying to make a relationship work and it’s just not working. Maybe you’ve lost someone you loved. Maybe you are making a huge decision and anxiety keeps holding you back. Maybe you are in over your head and don’t know what to do next.
No matter what has happened, life has let you down in a big way. And now you are left mindlessly scrolling through Instagram, and tossing and turning in your bed at 2 am unable to find sleep. Now you are holding back tears as you try to put your mascara on and face the day. Now you are scared to go for anything, scared to search for happiness again.
No matter what you are going through, I hope you keep fighting. I hope you keep going. Because life isn’t going to be this way forever. In fact, life can be quite beautiful, if you allow it to be. So please, find your courage and have faith. You will get through this. And as you fight your way through the messiness, please remember:
1. Sometimes the best option isn’t to keep holding on. It isn’t to continue to let yourself be dragged along while hanging on tightly with dear life. Sometimes the best option is to let go. Sometimes the safest bet is to release your grip and hope for a smooth landing.
2. If you go for something and you don’t get it, you didn’t fail. You still won because you had the courage to try. You still won because you had the guts to pursue something you really wanted. And that’s something to be proud of.
3. Life isn’t always going to be easy. Sometimes it’s going to be really, really hard. And when it’s hard, you’re still going to manage. You’re still going to get through, as you always have before.
4. You can’t always control what happens in your life. But you do have more power than you may think you do: you can control how you react to what happens. You can decide how you will let it affect you. You can decide what to do next.
5. It’s okay if today is a dark day for you. It’s okay if you stay in bed. It’s okay if you cry. It’s okay if you fall behind in what you had planned to accomplish. It’s okay to take your time. The world will still be waiting for you tomorrow.
6. If you have two choices, and you can’t decide which to choose, know that this probably means that you have two good options in front of you. And perhaps, neither of them are inherently the “best” option. You have two good options. You won’t choose wrong if you go with your heart.
7. It’s okay to be open and vulnerable, even when you know you might get hurt. It’s okay to wear your heart on your sleeve, even if it gets rejected. You never have anything to lose from putting more love out into the world, as God knows, the world needs it. And if someone can’t accept your love right now, continue to love anyway. The right someone is out there just waiting to receive it.
8. You are always supported. Whether it’s by family, by friends, by your girlfriend or boyfriend, by your therapist, by your teacher, by your mentor, by your acquaintance, by God, or by the universe, you are always supported. Someone or something out there always has your back. So lean in on them. Ask for help. You’re in good hands and you are most definitely not alone.
9. Loving yourself doesn’t always look pretty. It doesn’t always look like bubble baths and dark chocolate. Sometimes loving yourself is breaking up with someone, or ending a wonderful chapter of your life. Sometimes loving yourself is saying “no” even though you so badly want to say yes. Sometimes loving yourself is doing what is right for you, and not necessarily just doing what you want to do.
10. If you lose the person you thought was your person, he or she probably wasn’t actually your person after all.
11. Being fully yourself means that some people will not like you. But you know what? It’s not your concern. It’s not your worry. It’s not your responsibility to make others like you. Don’t let their opinions stop you from being beautiful and messy and crazy and wild. Don’t let others dim your light. Be yourself. The right people will love you. Promise.
12. Sometimes miracles take a little while to pan out. So be patient and trust that your magic will come in due time. And above all, keep your faith as you fight through the hard times. Keep believing. You see, you have to believe in miracles to be able to see them.