1. Not speak to you at all.
I know this seems counterintuitive, but it really is one of the most most important signs that an overthinker is into you. While on the outside they may be shifty-eyed and totally silent, on the inside they are a bubbling hot spring of emotions, second-guessing, and wondering if they can casually rub their pinkie against your pinkie without you picking up on it. Often they will look at you intensely, seem as though they’re about to say something, and then immediately look away or talk to someone else. This is a sign of affection.
2. Practice how to say “hello” a hundred times, then inevitably fuck it up.
If an overthinker likes you, chances are 130 percent that they have spent at least one full shower practicing the perfect, casual, seductive way to greet you. They were probably thinking something between “Hey you” and “What’s up,” and when they finally run into you, they’re liable to cough awkwardly and say something like “Hey what’s!” and when you’re like “Huh?” they start walking into the other direction.
3. Go out of their way to run into you.
It is never an accident. If you’re asking yourself, “Why do I keep running into this person at the most random times?” it is because they have been planning it with the precision of a Swiss watch. If you guys have mutual friends, they will always just happen to turn up at the parties you are at. (This is because they texted their friend like “Oh hey who is going tonight no big deal just thinking of stopping by” and their friend listed ten people, including you, and they showed up exactly 20.5 minutes later.)
4. Make actual pro and con lists about liking you.
The overthinker’s biggest fear is “What if I die unexpectedly and don’t have time to destroy the handwritten ‘pro and con’ list I have written about my crush on an actual piece of paper like a sweaty fifth grader?”
5. Talk way too much.
Occasionally they will finally talk to you (usually after a few drinks), and immediately get themselves into an inescapable TMI spiral. It will start about the photography class they’re taking, then devolve into how much they love cameras, then touch on how they spent all of last night looking up color photos of Hitler. They will continually trying to claw their way out by tacking on more information that somehow relates to the situation at hand, but they only dig themselves deeper, and eventually stop themselves by announcing they have to pee and abruptly leaving you to stand at the bar alone.
6. Show you weird things on the internet.
The overthinker’s most natural way of forming an immediate connection with someone is to attempt to show them something funny on the internet in a crowded bar, when you can’t actually hear anything and too many people are bumping into you to read. As you fail to understand the video/article/comic at hand, they will grow increasingly sweaty and nervous, and eventually rip the phone out of your hand in a panic, talking about how they’ll “show you later.”
7. Find little details about you online to awkwardly insert into conversation.
Last night, you tweeted about eating at a Russian restaurant. They spent an hour googling “cool Russian food.” You see them the next day, and they happen to drop some info about where to find good syrniki. Try not to find this as creepy as it is.
8. Make incredibly awkward jokes.
By far the most telltale sign that an overthinker is into you is their strange, uncomfortable attempts to make you laugh. They’re either going to run a joke into the ground by stumbling on the punchline, or start telling a story that they are laughing too hard to actually finish. In both cases, this is a true sign of affection, as it says “I am too into you to form coherent jokes, but as soon as you admit that you like me, too, you are in for a world of first-class comedy.” And honestly, you should be flattered.