22 Times Parents Disowned Their Children (And Vice Versa) And Why

He told us he was gay. We believed it was immoral, but he defied us. He was kicked out 3 years ago.

Updated 11 years ago, January 6, 2014

1. Dad chose new wife over son

My dad disowned me after I had an argument with his wife which ended with her asking my dad to pick between us and he chose her. I was 14 at the time and did not hear from him for 2 years, he tried to get back in contact when their marriage ended but we didn’t speak for another 3 years. I’m 22 now and have a good relationship with him but it took me a long while to forgive him completely.

2. Dad disowns son just to avoid ex-wife

My uncle disowned his son (my cousin) when he was around 2. He did so because the marriage ended and to avoid his ex wife, he stopped seeing his son all together. My uncle got remarried and has 3 more sons. It’s really sad, because a lot of my family took the same route to “disown” him. I still don’t understand why. My cousin is in his 30’s now and my brother and I still make a point to visit him whenever possible. It’s an unfortunate situation we refuse to be a part of him. Fuck their stance on the situation, he’s still family.

3. For marrying a white guy

My dad (briefly) disowned my sister because she was going to get married to a white guy (we’re Asians). He shaped up real quick though because my grandma called him from our home country and ripped him a new one for being a racist.

4. For following in his brother’s deviant footsteps

I have a friend who disowned a child.

It’s a very sad story. The family adopted two brothers from Russia. The oldest brother got involved with drugs and was knifed and killed during a drug deal gone bad.

The younger brother also got into drugs, and started stealing to support his habit. After trying several treatment programs, the parents finally kicked him out. He’s now in prison.

The heartbreaking part of the story for me was that he apparently lived behind his house, in his old playhouse, for several weeks. The parents (say they) didn’t know – the cops found him while looking for the perpetrator of a recent string of robberies in the area. I think it broke their hearts to do it, but now that it’s done, they essentially pretend he doesn’t exist. I think it’s the only way they can stay strong and not see him.

5. For having a gay son

My mother disowned me for being gay.

She went to her church group meeting and told the ladies what had transpired (expecting them all the support her decision or something) and I guess she was chastised for over an hour. I got a phone call that night first from the head of the church group offering me a place to stay and then my mother called and told me to come home right away. She doesn’t go to church any more

6. For being a Neo-Nazi

When he was 23 my son confessed to me that he was a Neo-Nazi. He didn’t look like the stereotype, didn’t go to rallies, didn’t talk about his beliefs to others, and didn’t bother anyone about it. He kept his beliefs to himself, and of course I accepted that without any issue.

After not having seen him for a few years, I ran into my son randomly in the street one day. He was 27 at that time. Shaved his head, swastika on his temple and an eagle on his bicep, holding a sign and shouting in protest together with a bunch of others, all sporting the same stereotype look. He called me later that night, asking me to bail him out of jail after he got arrested for “Beating up some scum.”

I did not bail him out, and I do not care for what he is doing with his life. As long as he continues living as he does, I want nothing to do with him. Should he turn around, contact me, and convince me that he regrets his action, I will have no problem accepting him as my son again, and pretending like nothing ever happened.

7. For doing an apprenticeship with a tattoo artist

My in-laws disowned my husband because he was doing an apprenticeship with a tattoo artist. His mom is a…I wouldn’t say fundie, but close to a fundie Christian. His dad supposedly is too, but I’m pretty sure he’s actually a sociopath doing what he can to get what he wants.

They received a lot of backlash from family/church community, so their story quickly changed to my husband disowning them. They’ve since tried to make nice, but husband wants no part of it.

8. For putting parents through the ringer

My parents disowned my step-sister. I had stopped acknowledging her long before. She stole from them often, money and jewelry mostly. She had some kids, all of which were failing in school and were at least two years behind where they should have been. So my parents took them and raised them. Step-sister freaked out and accused my parents of abuse and called the police. That was the last straw for my parents. They had to meet with the police and the police had to meet with the rest of the grandchildren and children and of course we all said there was no abuse.

My parents took a lot of crap from her, but when she attacked their integrity they were done caring about her.

9. Disowned by grandmother due to messed up family

I was disowned at 14 by my grandmother who raised me. There wasn’t any real trigger point, we just never got along. My grandmother and me had an argument one day and she told me to leave, so I did. I spent the next four years living on the streets, on friends couches or in shitty little apartments I managed to rent. My grandmother never tried to contact me, didn’t even show up to my high school graduation. It wasn’t till my biological mother got out of prison and contacted me on Facebook that she showed any interested. My grandma just didn’t want my mother to tell me anything to contradict the lies I was told growing up. I don’t speak to either now. I’d rather have no family than have to tiptoe around with that cluster fuck.

10. For not getting an abortion at 16

I was disowned by my mother. I got pregnant when I was 16 and she got mad when I told her that I would not be getting an abortion. She told me to pack my things and to “let her know when the bastard was out of my life” (believing that I would give the child up for adoption). I’ve been living with my dad since that day, and during the remaining months of my pregnancy, I received many more texts in which she made it a point to call my child a bastard, or tell me that I’d be a terrible mother, or any variation of petty remarks really.

The day my beautiful son was born, she tried to come to the hospital, but I was told she made a scene when she learned that I had asked the hospital not to let her visit me. She really wants to be more involved in my life now that she’s realized that this is probably the only grandchild she’s ever going to have. But I’ve decided that my life and my son’s life are a thousand times better without her.

11. Disowned for having more than two kids

My grandmother disowned my father at least once. The issue was that it was barbaric that my father had chosen to have 4 kids instead of the proper 2 or 1. This was on top of the already festering issue that my Jewish father had married a shiksa (my Catholic mother, who my grandmother blamed for the inappropriate number of grandchildren). Grandma disowned my parents and didn’t see my baby sister until she was over a year old. Funnily enough, my baby sister is easily my grandmother’s favorite grandchild.

12. Mother disowns daughter because she didn’t like her boyfriend

My mom disowned me because she hated the guy I started dating as a teenager. But I only dated him because he was the first warm body to come along and offer to get me away from her screaming crazy household. When I left with him after yet another SHRIEKING fest from mother, she MOVED, got a private land line and no one was EVER allowed to tell me where she went. I went about my business, moved 180 miles away, followed my little dreams and 2 years later she came crawling back asking forgiveness. This was over 25 years ago. She is still nuts, but she knows I will NEVER eat her shit again so, I’m in a power position. I got that going for me…which is nice.

13. Child disowns father for heavy drug use

I disowned my dad when I was 13. He had heavy drug use and turned into a violent person. After my parents divorced, he didn’t kick his habit. Visitation with him was pointless since he was never home and i stayed with his parents. So I stopped showing up. He eventually died from a car accident a few years later, so I regret never speaking to him again. But he didn’t put in any effort either.

14. Disowned by dad’s side of the family for not taking care of him after his heart attack

My dad’s side of the family basically disowned me when I was 17. I was away at a church retreat when my dad had a heart attack. I didn’t know about it since no one called me or messaged me. I go to visit him the following weekend (my parents are divorced and he has visitation rights on the weekend) and practically all the men on his side of the family are at the house. I pass by everyone and my uncle (the oldest of my dad’s brothers) calls me over, he basically tells me how pissed he is that I didn’t take care of my dad and that he had to take him to the hospital all by himself (I don’t know how I was suppose to take care of him- I couldn’t drive and was 200 miles away at the time). Uncle then tells me that he will personally make sure I never get a dime from when my dad dies because according to him, the only reason I ever visit my dad is because I am a gold digging daughter. That was when I realized that that my uncle despised me. He honest to got hated me and as soon as I turned 18 I never saw my dad or his family ever again. I sometimes feel bad that I don’t talk or see my dad but then I remember how my uncle treated me and not even my dad spoke up to defend me.

15. Mom disowns daughter for speaking up about being harassed by her brother

Over the past year my mum has effectively disowned my sister because she finally got up the courage to tell the police that my brother molested her when she was a child. Yeah, reread that. She now keeps her 27 year old son at home in the knowledge that none of her other (5) children will ever go there again. A year from now those two will only have each other. People are crazy.

16. Child disowns grandparents for beating her

I’m not a parent disowning a child. I was a child that disowned her grandparents. They were drunk at my uncle’s wedding reception and after everyone else left they decided to harass me and throw my bags at me and physically abuse me, because they over heard me talking about my deadbeat dad. That was 4 1/2 years ago and haven’t spoken to them since.

17. Uncle disowned for brutally raping his children

My grandparents disowned my uncle (one of their six children) because he brutally raped and molested his 12 and 10 year old daughters. He went to prison before I was born and I wasn’t even aware of his existence until I was 20 when he was released from his prison sentence due to a terminal cancer diagnosis and given 6 months to live. Most of the family then welcomed him back with open arms, including his wife.

18. Dad disowns son for joining the military

My dad disowned me because he didn’t want me to join the military, despite my adamant stance on enlisting. We didn’t talk for a year, and finally resumed conversations when he apologized. Seeing my dad apologize to me for a wrongdoing is something he’s never done before given his strict demeanor, so his apology was enough for me to forgive him. We’re on good terms today.

19. Mom disowns son for over-spending

My dumb shit of a son spent $15000 on 3 computers for gaming.

20. Child disowns entire family for being crazy

I am not in contact with any of my family members. Father is dead, mother is a mentally unstable addict and was horrifically abusive, I’m an only child. My aunts/uncles/cousins are so far removed from the situation (in terms of distance and also just good ol’ Southern upper middle class denial) that they couldn’t fathom that what I claimed happened could be true. Turns out I have a bunch of half-siblings out there, but they want nothing to do with me because my father cheated on his wife with my mother.

Despite everything, I am an overall well-adjusted and happy person. Life is what you make it!

21. Father disowns son for switching his major

Only briefly. My son decided 2 years in to switch his major from mechanical engineering to business. This meant he would lose part of his scholarship and he would no longer be able to participate in the Co-op program. He had a great job at Honda for almost $14 an hour through Co-op. He decided against the business degree and to proceed with a math degree instead. I un-disowned him, but still believe he would have had better opportunities with the ME degree, but at least he’s happier now.