Sometimes it is not about how a relationship ended. But it is about dusting your shoes off and having the courage to walk on. For many though, there is always that tendency to look back at what could have been. They fear the future and idolize the past.

You cannot have a great life built out of “what ifs.” It is up to you to muster the courage to keep going. Here is how you will know you are on track for something better in the future and you’ve been able to move on from a hurting relationship.

1. You are free of resentment

You do not have any bitterness towards the one who you once had a relationship with. In fact, you respect the decisions you both had to make in quitting a relationship that was not serving your best interests.

2. You can forgive

Not just the other person, but yourself. You can let go of any bondage not forgiving yourself and the other person will cost you. You understand that in life mistakes are made. There is no point in holding on to our errors, but having the strength to let go.

3. You are not afraid

You are not afraid of the past or moving on to the future. Rather you have renewed strength and courage to face a wonderful life ahead. You see possibilities and know that you will find the love you deserve.

4. You are in control

You are detached from what was. Rather you can now embrace what is. You have the spirit and attitude to determine how you respond to emotional issues. In fact you are happy and enthusiastic about where you currently are.

5. You have your self-esteem

Perhaps your self-esteem was bruised and you lost faith and confidence in yourself. That is in the past, you have renewed zeal and self-belief because you know what you are worth and what value you can offer the world.

6. You can trust again

Yes you have learned a lesson or two. But you do not see everyone the same way you see that partner who hurt you. You can trust again. You know that the world should give you what you deserve. And yes trusting is a process that can make you take what is yours.

7. You can love again

You can practice self-love and love others too. You may have shut the door on certain relationships. But somehow you have learned the best way to let go of the pain and heal is to go out to meet someone new, who will appreciate you for who you are.

8. You are positive

You are positive. This doesn’t mean you are naïve. No. it means you have found strength in knowing that the world is all about possibilities and certainties. If you can secure direction and maintain the desire to get those things you want, then you are no longer a victim of a hurting relationship.

9. You can listen to your heart

You can listen to your heart and find truth. You know you shouldn’t be afraid of going after those things that are suitable and ideal for you. Rather you should find joy in pursuing those things you are confident about.

10. You can escape

You are not stressed or burdened by the hurts of the past. Somehow you have escaped to discover yourself and find joy in who you are and what you represent. You may not have been able to retain your identity in a hurting relationship, but now you can.

Yes, you can cherish the moments and take one step at a time as you embrace freedom and let go of what did not work out for you.