You should follow your heart, not your ego.
Hear me out, because I know that sounds like a Hallmark greeting.
Following your heart instead of your ego is the difference between prioritizing what you need vs. what you want.
Your ego WANTS and your heart NEEDS.
Pretty simple, right?
Not really. We’re complicated humans. We’re confusing AF, and most of the time it’s difficult to know the difference.
Do I need that 6th slice of pizza?
Do I need to fire off that 3 a.m. “u up” text?
Do I need to do this, do that?
It’s tough to tell, and that’s how we get in trouble in our lives. That’s how we end up with people and in places and in careers and in emotional states that are frustrating — where we don’t know what we’re doing and where we’re constantly doubting ourselves.
We think we’re listening to our hearts, but we’re actually listening to our egos.
Take a second right now and think back to some time in your life where you did something BIG — you ended a relationship, you moved cities, you changed jobs, you finally spoke your mind.
Whether you realize it, in that instance, you basically told your ego to fuck off.
Do you remember a moment like that?
That moment where you called off a serious relationship that you knew wasn’t right for you?
That moment where you finally stood up for yourself to your parents?
That moment where you left your comfortable job for something that actually inspired you?
In those moments, you turned your back on your ego and instead listened to and lived by what was in your heart.
Your ego told you that you would never be able to be single or start over again. Your ego told you that drama, conflict, fighting, and doubting your partner was just part of a relationship.
Your ego told you that your parents are always right, that you should never question them or their wisdom and that they know what’s right for you.
Your ego told you to sit your ass down and pay your dues, that hating your job is part of life, that you should be patient and that change would be bad.
But in that moment, you finally let your heart do the talking.
And your heart told you a different story.
Your heart reminded you that life is ready to give you more.
It reminded you that you need to step up and challenge your expectations, challenge your assumptions, and challenge what you think you want.
It reminded you to step up and let go of your ego. Let go of your desire to be in control, to know exactly what’s next.
This is what you’re heart wants to tell you if you’ll only listen to it:
You’re meant to fall in love, fall out of love, and fall back in love as many times as necessary.
You’re meant to see sunsets in as many different cities as you want.
You’re meant to start over as many times as necessary.
You’re meant to live and discover and rediscover.
Fuck your ego. Seriously. It’s the enemy.
When you step up and make a decision with your heart, you’re pointing yourself in a direction your ego would never allow.
So be soft with me for a moment. Be vulnerable.
Why are you in that relationship? Is it to have a hottie at your side so you feel good about yourself? Is it so you don’t feel like a loser on a Friday night?
Why are you chasing that job? Why are you working 90 hours a week hating everything just for a six figure paycheck? Why?
Why are your ambitions your ambitions? Are they meaningful? Are they from your heart or your ego?
WHY? Why are those your ambitions?
Are you one of those people who says “success is the best revenge”? Are you one of those people who says “I have a bunch of motherfuckers to prove wrong”?
That’s your ego talking.
You’re doing things, setting goals, and becoming a person born of ego. You’re living a life with desires and ambitions that aren’t really your own.
So stop and ask why.
In my experience, your heart will always tell you that your “why” is to embrace change. You’re a human filled with potential and curiosity, and it’s your purpose to evolve and grow.
Your heart wants you to STEP UP and question why!
The next time you feel lost or you have a big decision to make, take a step back and say to yourself, “Am I thinking about this from a place of ego or my heart? Am I doing what’s best for me? Is this what I need or what I want?”
Push yourself to learn to know the difference and watch how your life dramatically changes for the better.